How do families with young children find the time?

I’m very overweight; I’ve surfed weight consistently.
My most recent surge of activity was swimming 4-5 times a week - often leaving my partner either solo with the kids in the morning, or essentially not seeing her / spending quality time together some nights

With a one hour commute each way to and from work.
I have a 7 and a 4 year old.

The kids start school at 8:20am; I arrive at work and 9:20am, leave at 5:20; home at 6:20 - leaving one hour with the kids (who are at their worst) before bed time.

I want the gym to be an “us” activity we can do together. It’s quality time, and we’re more likely to be consistent if we keep each other honest.
I just don’t know when we’re going to find the time.

Kids that age in a gym crache 3-4 times a week seems cruel - as if they’ll enjoy ur for a week then hate it…..

When am I supposed to do this?!

@ryspi76 Options:

Go to bed at 10, get up at 5, gym until 6:30, come home and help before work.

Go on weekends. You have time.

Gym child care twice a week, and once a week go to the gym alone, and your wife goes alone once.

Run outside around your neighborhood for 30 minute stints, you won't be gone that long and won't be much missed.

Weight is really about your diet, but exercise will also extend your life. Make time for it and set an example to your children that exercise and health and wellness is something that life is actually about, it's not something that you just try to fit in in the cracks around the edges.

@luisesvelle This is the way

@gigi198 Yup, my kids start school at 7 so drop them off go to gym then work. But going to bed 10 and getting up at 5:30.

@luisesvelle Cannot overemphasize the diet impact as a parent. It takes 0 minutes of your time to eat a calorie deficit and lose weight. Anecdotally I’m 215lb man in my early 30s and it still takes me a good 45 minutes (not counting gym commute time) to burn the same 500 calories that takes 0 minutes to just not eat by reducing portion sizes at meals.

@luisesvelle Does anyone Wii fit anymore or jump rope? Hop skotch? The old agility courses using ladders, dots, and low bars? We still have public “work out” equipment near playgrounds and parks that have ellipticals, rowers, bars, etc. 4 years old isn’t too young to learn how to ride a bike or rollerblade or skateboard. I’d suggest trying to make it a family thing - walk to the park and let the kids run around. Do a HIIT body weight workout with your spouse, then finish it off with some fun “races” with the kids. Who can skip/bunny hop/frog hop/bear crawl/crab walk to the tree the fastest? If manageable, use the kids as weights. Bench press them, swing/carry them for a kettlebell thrust or goblet squat, give piggyback rides.

Talk to the kids about goals, even nutrition basics. Have a fitness goal (50 push-ups or a sub-40 5k) and weight goal (# lbs by X date). Ask them to help remind you or get involved (like ask them what 3 veg/colors should be on your plate for dinner). Track and share your progress. Heck, even incentivize it for them - if mommy and daddy meet their goal, we can all do a movie night! Bonfire! Zoo! Bowling! It might be easy to give up on yourself, but stick a cute picture of your family near your goal sheet/phone screen saver and it ain’t so easy to disappoint them.

They don’t need to be dramatic changes. Build up tiny habits that will all contribute over time. Start taking 1 stair each day during lunch (like just go and do a step-up). Then 2, 3, a flight of stairs, 3 flights of stairs, etc as you build up. Have 1 single cube/slice/leaf of vegetable on your plate each meal. A kernel of corn or slice of zucchini. Eventually you’ll add more. And if the habit doesn’t work for you? Fine, change it. Do 3 squats every time you flush the toilet. 3 calf raises every time you wash your hands. Hamstring stretch while you brush your teeth.