Down to the last few pounds. 1200 calories made me feel like crap, but not losing weight if I ate any higher. Advice please?

@inquirer2016 Well for starters I think you look fine and are probably being a bit harsh on yourself (which I get).

If you're training with weights there is no way on earth I would use scales as a reference point. I find the scales are a really awful measure in general anyway, because people (myself included) tend to fixate on one number rather than a general range, which leaves no room for fluctuations during pmt, ovulation, post big meal, etc etc. It's a kind of prison you lock yourself into where you punish yourself for natural fluctuations.

My best advice to any woman wanting to be smaller is to throw the scales away and lift heavy. I mean as heavy as you can. It's really hard for women to get 'big' - what you will find happens instead is that you look 'toned', and this muscle you gain equals a faster resting metabolism and less body fat. Make sure you eat plenty to feed the muscles or your efforts at the gym will be wasted.

I am not an advocate of 1200 calories a day and think eating that little is damaging to your metabolism (I've been there). Eat plenty of the right stuff and you'll be fine.
 
@dawn16 I second all of this. 1200 calories a day would probably result in gradual weight loss for someone your height if you were sedentary. Weight training 5 days / week is pretty far from sedentary. Remember that in order to achieve sustainable weight loss you must eat a sustainable diet.

Ditch the scale. It isn't going to help your body get to where you'd like it to be. Muscle is much denser than fat, so as you gain strength through lifting it isn't uncommon to also notice some weight gain.

Here's my personal anecdote: I'm 5'5" and once upon a time weighed about 130lbs. I hated my body and desperately wanted to shed some of my fat, especially from from my stomach. When I reached my goal weight (115lbs) after months of restrictive eating and exhausting cardio sessions, I was dismayed to find that I still wasn't satisfied; my stomach was still pudgy. (I ended up losing a lot more weight and developed an eating disorder in the process, but that's another story.) My point being that although I lost the weight, I didn't like the way I looked or felt.

Fast forward 8 years; I'm still 5'5" and 125-130lbs again. But after years of strength training, I look completely different from my former 130lbs-self. I'm strong as fuck and it shows - I love my arms, legs, back, chest, and even my stomach (at least on my good days, lol). I threw away my scale years ago and it was one of the best decisions I've made regarding my fitness progression. I know I would have flipped a shit if I had watched myself gain 25 fucking pounds over the course of two years, told myself I was a complete failure and turned back to (literally) running myself into the ground.

tl,dr: get rid of your scale. Keep busting your ass weight training, eat properly and you'll see positive results in good time. Don't expect to get abs overnight; be consistent and sustainable.
 
@dawn16 Yes! More weight training and more food. Sounds counterintuitive but it's true. Here's one of my favorite examples. Staci goes from 170lbs to 117 to 131 to 142. 131 and 142 look amazing and she gets to eat!!! Weight training and food!
 
@bushido8000 It does seem counter-intuitive, for sure. Last year when I started lifting, I kept reading everywhere that I had to eat eat eat and it felt so wrong. I come from a long background of starve/binge, disordered eating and self punishment. At the beginning, I gained weight and it felt so disheartening. But I trusted the process and here I am one year down the line 3 sizes smaller and probably the same as my starting weight, if not heavier. And stronger and fitter than ever. And I can eat twice as much as before without it impacting my body.
 
@dawn16 Omg yes! Also that's fantastic and an incredible accomplishment. Congratulations!

I'm working on getting there. I'm trying to build a strength training routine that I can do consistently (I'm trying out the recommended routine from r/bodyweightfiness with weighted squats and deadlifts). Up next, I'll start focusing on my diet more and accepting that I don't have to eat 1500 calories or less while working out to get the body and abilities that I want (I'm 5'6", 145lbs).
 
@inquirer2016 If you didn't gain any weight and you were eating over 2000 cals a day at least once a week... and you are only guessing what you ate... well... seems you need to be stricter with a diet at a higher cal. I'd aim if I were you at 1700 max - and trying to hit 1500 on most days. Calorie count. properly. (I find if I need to cut I just get rid of all 'treats' so no snacks, pudding, milky coffees etc. I calorie count too but this works for me - not 'hungry' but it is difficult.).

THEN really focus on your weights. Really push yourself. If you can do 8-10 reps easy, up the weight. If you can get to an HIIT class - GO GO GO! It will give you a good example of just how far you can push yourself. It will take a few months for your gainz to show - you might only lose a few pounds of weight in this time but you WILL look leaner.

Be patient and by june/july you will be super happy. Also you wont care about your 'boyish' frame. You will be stoked about how much you can lift. I would suggest using the extra cals I suggest on protein shakes for just after your workout. I have noticed since I started with these (about 6 weeks ago) I feel much better, less DOMS, and I'm looking more ripped. Ahem.

As for hunger - might i suggest tea? Cup of warm fruit tea helps I find. No sugar.

TLDR: Do a recomp instead. up your calories a small amount. consider protein shakes for after exercise. Push yourself hard when you exercise. Have Patience. will take 3-4 months of hard work before you really see a difference. But you will be stoked when you do.
 
@antinomian This is what I needed to hear, thank you. 1500-1700 sounds like a reasonable amount. This way I can eat clean while still incorporate my craving foods moderately, and still stay under.
 
@inquirer2016 So we're only talking about the last 8 weeks here. It's common when you increase calories for the body to retain more water for a few weeks. But it goes away after roughly a month. Mid January to Feb is like three weeks, so you probably were losing fat but held more water.

Try eating 250 under the TDEE calculated maintenance for 5 months. That should be close to 10lb, will keep calories up for strength gain, and will reduce water weight at the beginning if youre consistent.
 
@inquirer2016 Try taking a diet break. Build your calories gently back up by 50-100 calories a week (google reverse dieting or find Omar isuf on YouTube who does fantastic informational videos).
Build up to an approximate maintenance calories or higher and consider looking at building muscle to increase your tdee even higher.
If you've been eating at low calories for a while it's worth considering you've undergone some metabolic adaption and taking a diet break will help build your metabolism back up.
 
@tfmartin This is an excellent point. You're supposed to eat at least 1200 calories to prevent your body's metabolism from slowing down. However that number increases as you work out more. Try eating more than 1200 calories.

I also agree with the other comments. Less than 120 lbs might just not be your where your body wants/needs to be. If you want to change the shape of your body, try focusing on your body fat percentage instead. You can try putting on more muscle (which requires more food). The scale may go up or stay the same but your body will start to change.
 
@inquirer2016 I'm in the same boat. I'm 5'9" and 150 and shooting for 140, but 1200 (on rest days) has proven too hard for me to do consistently. But with 1400 I'm not seeing weight change...
 
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