Hey everyone, so I guess I just need some encouragement right now. I’ve been trying to intuitively eat so as not to be obsessive over food (I have a binging problem) and working out for the past 6 weeks. From September-November I was eating out a lot and eating junk not really focusing on what I was eating and obviously gained some weight. I’ve been making my own meals at home and just being overall healthier in my food choices. I will eat out maybe once a week on the weekend. I’ve been doing Pilates or going to the gym 5 days a week. As I said it’s been 6 weeks and I barely see any progress. It’s super discouraging because I’m being consistent. I feel better overall from making healthier choices and getting movement in but not seeing a physical change makes me upset. If you guys have any advice or motivation pls share it with me. I’m still going to be consistent as I’m trying to change my habits and lifestyle but I’m also trying to look good for my vacation in march haha. How long has it taken u guys to notice results. Will I start seeing them soon or am I doing something wrong.
Feeling discouraged
- Thread starter crusader1
- Start date
@crusader1 You really need to be working with a mental health professional if your goal is weight loss when you have been recently actively struggling with binging which is a form of disordered eating.
Working with a professional will not only make sure that you’re not continuing to struggle with disordered behaviors, but they can also help you understand that you really shouldn’t be expecting change based on the information you provided in this post. The entire point of intuitive eating is to maintain your weight, it is not designed for or effective for weight loss. Listening to your bodies cues means you will be eating the amount of calories your body needs to sustain your activity level.
It’s also not realistic to expect significant change in only six weeks. Remembered at six weeks of the average amount of time that people will start to notice extremely small changes, and it’s completely normal to not notice anything at all. So even if you were in a deficit, this is normal.
I would strongly encourage you to work with a professional who will probably have you shift your focus to simply repairing your relationship with food and your body. Once you go from there, it may be safe for you to lose weight but based on the information in this post, it is not a good idea for you to be focusing on these kind of goals right now
Working with a professional will not only make sure that you’re not continuing to struggle with disordered behaviors, but they can also help you understand that you really shouldn’t be expecting change based on the information you provided in this post. The entire point of intuitive eating is to maintain your weight, it is not designed for or effective for weight loss. Listening to your bodies cues means you will be eating the amount of calories your body needs to sustain your activity level.
It’s also not realistic to expect significant change in only six weeks. Remembered at six weeks of the average amount of time that people will start to notice extremely small changes, and it’s completely normal to not notice anything at all. So even if you were in a deficit, this is normal.
I would strongly encourage you to work with a professional who will probably have you shift your focus to simply repairing your relationship with food and your body. Once you go from there, it may be safe for you to lose weight but based on the information in this post, it is not a good idea for you to be focusing on these kind of goals right now
@rodneys Thank you. Yea I’m trying to be patient with the results I definitely feel better and notice slight changes as I am getting more physical activity and eating much cleaner. I don’t think I have a sever ed or anything I’ve just noticed that I have had binging tendencies in the past but since I’ve focused on my goal I haven’t since I started! I mainly don’t want to track calories because I feel there’s a fine line where it can become obsessive and I don’t want to focus so much on how much I’m eating more about what I put in my body and how it makes me feel but idk if this approach is good for weight loss. Since I’m not eating processed foods as much or eating out I feel that I’m definitely in a slight deficit I’m also 5’0 118ish pounds and 22 didn’t mention before
@crusader1 The fact that you have binging tendencies and feel like you can’t count calories without it becoming obsessive means that it is extremely important that you get support from an eating disorder specialist if you are going to try to continue to lose weight. The fact that you’re already at a perfectly healthy weight makes it even more important because disordered behavior becomes more dangerous more quickly when you’re at a healthy weight.
I’m not really sure where the idea comes from that all you have to do to avoid disordered behavior when trying to lose weight is not count calories, but it’s absolutely not true. Any attempt at trying to lose weight it’s just as likely to trigger more severe disordered behavior, it doesn’t matter if you track calories or not. I know that you don’t feel like you need that extra support, but as a Mental-health professional, if one of my clients said this to me I would be writing them an immediate referral to an eating disorder specialist. Please remember that eating disorders are extremely dangerous and can happen very quickly. So even if you don’t feel like you need that support right now, what is the harm in at least having it just to be safe? At the very least, we can go over the basics of this and help you suck much more realistic expectations, because right now it seems like you’re expecting too much too fast.
I’m not really sure where the idea comes from that all you have to do to avoid disordered behavior when trying to lose weight is not count calories, but it’s absolutely not true. Any attempt at trying to lose weight it’s just as likely to trigger more severe disordered behavior, it doesn’t matter if you track calories or not. I know that you don’t feel like you need that extra support, but as a Mental-health professional, if one of my clients said this to me I would be writing them an immediate referral to an eating disorder specialist. Please remember that eating disorders are extremely dangerous and can happen very quickly. So even if you don’t feel like you need that support right now, what is the harm in at least having it just to be safe? At the very least, we can go over the basics of this and help you suck much more realistic expectations, because right now it seems like you’re expecting too much too fast.
@rodneys I appreciate your response! I’ve never really thought about what you’re saying too much so it’s definitely good knowledge and important to learn about. I’ve counted calories in the past and stuck to it and lost weight healthily over about 5 months I just felt that it wasn’t sustainable for me in the long run because I’m not gonna eat 1200 calories forever and I don’t wanna be constantly worried about how many calories are in something, if you know what I mean. I feel like maybe my original post didn’t come off how I meant it, I’m not expecting to lose weight quick as I want to form habits and have sustainable weight loss then maintenance. I have a 7 month plan to recomp my body and hopefully lose 5-10 pounds at most. I guess I just wanted to express how discouraging it can be early on when you’re being consistent and making healthy changes but don’t see the physical results yet (I know usually u see them around 12 weeks). Also about the therapist I’m not sure what resources I would have and honestly haven’t thought about it as I never felt I had a big problem because I’ve been aware of my actions and assumed most ppl feel this way. Although I do think therapy is super helpful and important just not sure how I’d go about it
@crusader1 I’m sorry, but you’re contradicting yourself a bit and I don’t really feel comfortable continuing to give you advice because I really think it’s very important that you see a specialist. You originally said that you have binging behaviors and you get really obsessive when you calorie count, that’s not the same thing as feeling calorie counting isn’t sustainable in the long term. Also, you don’t have to eat at such a low amount like 1200 cal to lose weight. Your primary care physician can help you get connected with someone who can help.
@rodneys Okay no worries! I feel that I was exaggerating by saying I have binging tendencies and just trying to further explain my situation 
also yes I feel that counting calories becomes obsessive and unsustainable in general; not just for me (you can’t count calories for your whole life) I’ve seen multiple posts on this sub about it and also just most people in my life that I’ve talked to about it (especially in the gym community). Have a nice evening, thanks for your replies
also yes I feel that counting calories becomes obsessive and unsustainable in general; not just for me (you can’t count calories for your whole life) I’ve seen multiple posts on this sub about it and also just most people in my life that I’ve talked to about it (especially in the gym community). Have a nice evening, thanks for your replies @crusader1 I’m sorry, but you’re wrong and I need to address what you said because this is a very dangerous misconception that could prevent somebody from seeking treatment when they really need it.
Counting calories does not always become obsessive. This statement is 100% false and is an EXTREMELY dangerous misconception to be putting out there. Please understand that I’m not trying to attack you or be harsh, but as a mental health professional this statement was really difficult for me to read because this misconception prevents people from getting treatment and eating disorders are so detrimental to your health and can be fatal so it’s very important confront false information.
Most people are not going to track calories the whole life. Nobody enjoys tracking calories and it is tedious, and most people who do it are able to eat intuitively afterwards. However, it is NOT true that it’s always going to become obsessive. Just because you see it frequently in this sub and hear it in gym communities doesn’t make it a fact. Weight loss and fitness focus spaces have high percentages of people struggling with disordered thoughts and behavior. People who are struggling with calorie counting becoming a disordered behavior are all so much more likely to speak about it and post about it than those who don’t struggle with it. I have never struggled with calorie counting becoming an obsessive behavior, so there’s not really anything for me to post about or share about in that regard.
The problem with saying that calorie counting is always going to become obsessive is that if someone believes this, they’re a lot less likely to get help when that behavior manifests because they think it’s normal. But it’s not normal and anybody who feels that way needs to get help.
Again, I know that you mean absolutely no harm and I hope you understand that I’m not trying to come after you. This misconception is a really common one and it’s not your fault for believing it. But, because of how dangerous eating disorders are, it’s very very important to not spread misinformation which is why I wanted to make sure I addressed it. I wish you the best of luck in your journey and I hope that you decide to reach out for the support that you need.
Counting calories does not always become obsessive. This statement is 100% false and is an EXTREMELY dangerous misconception to be putting out there. Please understand that I’m not trying to attack you or be harsh, but as a mental health professional this statement was really difficult for me to read because this misconception prevents people from getting treatment and eating disorders are so detrimental to your health and can be fatal so it’s very important confront false information.
Most people are not going to track calories the whole life. Nobody enjoys tracking calories and it is tedious, and most people who do it are able to eat intuitively afterwards. However, it is NOT true that it’s always going to become obsessive. Just because you see it frequently in this sub and hear it in gym communities doesn’t make it a fact. Weight loss and fitness focus spaces have high percentages of people struggling with disordered thoughts and behavior. People who are struggling with calorie counting becoming a disordered behavior are all so much more likely to speak about it and post about it than those who don’t struggle with it. I have never struggled with calorie counting becoming an obsessive behavior, so there’s not really anything for me to post about or share about in that regard.
The problem with saying that calorie counting is always going to become obsessive is that if someone believes this, they’re a lot less likely to get help when that behavior manifests because they think it’s normal. But it’s not normal and anybody who feels that way needs to get help.
Again, I know that you mean absolutely no harm and I hope you understand that I’m not trying to come after you. This misconception is a really common one and it’s not your fault for believing it. But, because of how dangerous eating disorders are, it’s very very important to not spread misinformation which is why I wanted to make sure I addressed it. I wish you the best of luck in your journey and I hope that you decide to reach out for the support that you need.
@rodneys Thanks for informing me! And don’t worry I don’t feel attacked I’m always open to learn something new. You’re 100% right about the prevalence of ED in weight loss and fitness though. I feel that where I am now in my journey I am able to do a lot of introspection and handle everything quite well, I do a lot of research on this type of thing (in this case involving eating) and I try to implement healthy tips and habits to build a healthier relationship with food everyday. If I do feel out of control tho I definitely won’t hesitate to get in touch with the resources I need. I am a student in psychology as well so I’m of course very open and willing to seeking help! Thank you again!
christiandad
New member
@crusader1 My two cents:
- When I have been eating only intuitively, I either maintained or slowly gained weight. Most bodies want to stay at their weight level, so if you're listening to your body's signals, they're probably telling you to eat enough to not lose weight (yay survival!). This isn't necessarily a bad thing and seems like it can be a really healthy step for you right now. In this case, don't worry about the number on the scale or your measurements or anything, focus more on your relationship with food and learning to be okay eating what you want in moderation based on your body.
- If I am trying to lose weight, I usually only start to see scale progress after 3-4 weeks with a constant deficit. I've lost 10lbs in the last year and I don't feel like I look that different even in swimsuit pictures. I focus more on my health goals and trust that appearance changes will come in time if I stick with it. But also, I try to get to where I'm completely content with my body where it is - if I looked how I do right now for the rest of my life, I can be happy with that. Developing healthy habits need to be sustainable for the rest of your life. Having a short term goal like your vacation goal can sometimes be counterproductive because you want to hit it too hard and then burn out or give up, or even if you do reach your goal, if it wasn't sustainable, you go right back to what you were doing before the goal and then feel bad about regressing. It's hard to shift to focusing on health and happiness over appearance, but it's so much more relaxing and rewarding once you do!
@christiandad Thanks for the comment! You have the same mindset as me and I also have a google doc where I mark down my daily and weekly goals haha! overall goal is to just have a healthier lifestyle and I know the physical will come in time. I’m not super focused on the vacation but it would be nice if I looked a bit leaner by then
my weight fluctuates a lot and in the summer I always feel much leaner and I assume it’s cuz I’m moving much more than in the winter I’m just trying to get to a point where I can maintain at 5-10 lbs lower. When I have counted calories in the past it was great and worked well but I don’t want to have to measure everything I eat. I enjoy food and don’t want to stress about it. I’m hoping that by upping my physical activity and eating healthier food in general that I’ll still manage to lose a couple points over a couple months.
my weight fluctuates a lot and in the summer I always feel much leaner and I assume it’s cuz I’m moving much more than in the winter I’m just trying to get to a point where I can maintain at 5-10 lbs lower. When I have counted calories in the past it was great and worked well but I don’t want to have to measure everything I eat. I enjoy food and don’t want to stress about it. I’m hoping that by upping my physical activity and eating healthier food in general that I’ll still manage to lose a couple points over a couple months.christiandad
New member
@crusader1 Yep, I empathize with all of that! I've wavered on the calorie counting and I think I've landed somewhere that works well for me. I make it a practice to log my daily calories every day, no matter how focused I am or am not on eating a specific way. I estimate a lot of the calories and I'm fine with that. If I go out, I might google it, or I might just look at the dish and use my food knowledge to guess. It doesn't have to be perfect. I find that this practice helps keep me mindful of what I'm eating - I don't just blindly eat 1000 calories for lunch because that's what I got. It also helps me not just throw in the towel when I have events where I eat more. If I go on vacation or to a social event, I'm still logging the guesses. Even if I'm over every day for a week, it's fine and I don't stress about it. But I find it's a lot easier to return to normal portion sizes after that when things settle down, because I've been practicing being mindful of it the whole time.
@christiandad I am definitely practicing being mindful. Since I have counted in the past I feel that I have a decent estimate of the calories in certain foods. I don’t log my calories but I do log everything I eat just to keep me mindful and I don’t beat myself up if I have an “unhealthy” food. I try to do everything in moderation. I honestly might just try to count my calories on what I would consider a normal day of eating to see where I’m at with everything because as they say, we usually underestimate the calories we’re eating. Even if I’m in a 100-200 deficit I think that might be a more realistic goal for me, for now at least. Thanks for this, it’s reassuring.
christiandad
New member
@crusader1 Yeah, that sounds great. That's about what I do and I find that it's really maintainable. I lose weight pretty slowly, but I feel like I could do it forever and that's more important for me. I also look at my calories on a weekly average rather than daily because I have some days where I eat around maintenance, some days where I'm pretty content being far under, and some days where I go over by 100-300 calories. As long as my weekly in is lower than my weekly out, I get "good marks" in my excel sheet hahaha
@christiandad Awesome! Good for you. It definitely does sound sustainable that way. How do you calculate your weekly calories? Just whatever ur daily is times 7?
christiandad
New member
@crusader1 I use fitbit to log my calories and it has a view where it says your average in and your average out per day. If you were logging manually for calories in, you'd do the sum of all the calories you ate for the week divided by 7. For out you'd need to estimate it, probably based on BMR and daily activity.
@christiandad Okay I didn’t know you could use Fitbit to log calories. I usually use my fitness pal but I do have an Apple Watch. Do you have any recommendation on an app to use?
christiandad
New member
@crusader1 I have MFP but I don't use it. I just opened it and it looks like you can go to the Nutrition Page (I got to it from Newsfeed). Then at the top where it says Day View change it to Week View. And then there's a Daily Average.
I also saw someone mention HealthifyMe the other day. Here's an image of what they shared and it showed the average calories for the week: https://i.redd.it/ldiybpctd37a1.jpg I haven't used it though.
Maybe Apple Watch has a health app too where you can log calories and see averages?
I also saw someone mention HealthifyMe the other day. Here's an image of what they shared and it showed the average calories for the week: https://i.redd.it/ldiybpctd37a1.jpg I haven't used it though.
Maybe Apple Watch has a health app too where you can log calories and see averages?
@christiandad I don’t think you can on Apple Watch but I looked it up and it brought me to another similar app so I’m gonna try it out thanks a lot for you advice I appreciate it! I’ll probably update in a month and see where I’m at
thanks a lot for you advice I appreciate it! I’ll probably update in a month and see where I’m at@crusader1 Have you tried tracking food in an app just to get an idea on macros? Not necessarily calories, but to make sure you have a good split of protein, carbs and fats?
I've been vegan for almost 3 years and I used an app to help me get better at judging my macros, as I have a tendency to eat too many fats (lots of nuts and avocados, not just my fried potato addiction). My protein target is only 25%, as up to the 35% suggested max was making me sick, but using the app for a few months helped improve my judgement.
I know you said you've been eating better, but in case it helps you or anyone else who reads this, I heard a tip that we've been loving: store fruit and healthy snacks in the door of the fridge instead of the drawers. Put unhealthy foods (cheeses and chocolates) and rarely used condiments in the drawers. Saw it on Tiktok for ADHD tips and it's been a game changer!
But it sounds like you've made a lot of progress and I hope you can focus on how proud you should be. It's not easy to make so many changes!
I'd suggest trying some yoga at a studio where they focus on lots of long poses, working out all those muscles against your own body weight. A proper class will teach you how to move and build the poses that'll work muscles hard to target at a gym. And lean into the self care of it, breath a little deeper and be kind to yourself.
I've been vegan for almost 3 years and I used an app to help me get better at judging my macros, as I have a tendency to eat too many fats (lots of nuts and avocados, not just my fried potato addiction). My protein target is only 25%, as up to the 35% suggested max was making me sick, but using the app for a few months helped improve my judgement.
I know you said you've been eating better, but in case it helps you or anyone else who reads this, I heard a tip that we've been loving: store fruit and healthy snacks in the door of the fridge instead of the drawers. Put unhealthy foods (cheeses and chocolates) and rarely used condiments in the drawers. Saw it on Tiktok for ADHD tips and it's been a game changer!
But it sounds like you've made a lot of progress and I hope you can focus on how proud you should be. It's not easy to make so many changes!
I'd suggest trying some yoga at a studio where they focus on lots of long poses, working out all those muscles against your own body weight. A proper class will teach you how to move and build the poses that'll work muscles hard to target at a gym. And lean into the self care of it, breath a little deeper and be kind to yourself.