@ryspi76 I know you want to do it together, but honestly my husband and I have found that separately works best, although we do very different activities and for us it's our alone time that we enjoy by ourselves. We do keep each other accountable by reminding the other one to go. If I miss a workout then I can't do it "later" because that's when my husband's time is and I'd be infringing.
We have a 1 year old, but a similar daycare schedule to yours (8:30am drop-off, 5:30pm pickup, bed from 6:30p - 7:30p depending on the day). I do Barre in the early mornings (6am) 2-3 weekdays and 9am on the weekend. Baby wakes up around the time I get back, but my husband handles him until I'm shower, dressed, ready. Then I usually take baby to daycare and pickup.
Husband has a hybrid job so on days he's home it's easier for him to go for a bike ride or jump on the trainer at lunch or before/after his work while baby is at daycare. Otherwise he'll do it after the kiddo is in bed or on weekends he'll give me advance notice if he wants to go on a long ride, just to make sure I didn't have honey-do stuff or my own plans. We just communicate a lot.
And then we don't keep snacks in the house, which probably helps the most