I can’t even do a wall push. Not even one

@alidvx You can do it! I had similar struggles and it took me a long time to realize that part of the reason was that I didn’t know how to listen to my body. I had no mind body awareness and couldn’t tell what muscles to squeeze or if I was/wasn’t doing the thing. It took time and I’m still working on some things (I still struggle with my right hip/glute for example), but being able to tell “oh when I do this movement I should be engaging x muscle and feeling it here” has been a game changer. And unfortunately that just comes with time! Don’t give up, you got this!
 
@alidvx Start slow! Starting out with a plank is probably not a great idea.

Get some exercise tubes and a few light dumbbells. Use this and start with just a light weight. The tubes will have some exercises with them. For dumbbells, I do about 4 moves that include side lifts, overhead press, triceps (behind the head) and curls. Even if you start with 1 or 2 pound dumbbells, it doesn't matter. Use the one or two pound dumbbells the first week and then add more reps. Once that is easy, get a dumbbell that is a little heavier and use that.

If you have a stationary bicycle, that would be great! Do 2 easy minutes every day for a week. Increase to 3. Once you get to 5 minutes a day, increase the difficulty.

Try countertop pushups. Start with two! I do countertop pushups while my microwave is working. The 2-minute food warm-up gives me a workout!

Good luck and just keep going. Start slow and don't have ANY expectations. Just keep at it. You will be surprised that one day, you feel stronger and you actually enjoy your workout.

PS: I'm 78. If I can do it, so can you.
 
@alidvx I can plank for a few minutes, can do pushups and pullups, and I still shake as soon as I start planking. It means your core is engaged and you're improving! If you're planking (or any exercise) and it's easy, it's not doing anything for you. Keep it up, you'll get to where you want to be.
 
@alidvx You just need to build it up bit by bit. Even two second planks are better than sitting there on the couch doing nothing. At least you're aware you need to be fit and you are trying! Like the others have been saying, keep going! :)
 
@alidvx I've been training for like 2 years and still can't do a single sit up, and I can only do 3 pushups on my feet before I have to put my knees down. Don't judge yourself too hard on your weak spots, just keep training and improving. You'll be better at some stuff than others, so don't let it get you down.
 
@alidvx If you have access to dumbbells those can really help with building upper body strength. Long term you can start with wall pushups then progress to doing them on a steadily decreasing incline. But if you can’t do wall pushups yet dumbbell shoulder and tricep exercises with dumbbells can be a good first step before that. And even once you can do wall pushups they are a great accessory.

For abs if your form is only breaking down somewhere into a set rather than right from the start, start with very few reps and work up from there. If you can only do 5 good pairs of bicycle crunches instead of the prescribed 10, start at 5 and try to add a rep or two every workout or every week.
 
@alidvx Be kind to yourself!

We start where we are, and work at getting better. The good news is that putting in honest work means that something has to get better! It might "just" be getting closer to what normal people can do... but if you haven't been there in a long time (or ever!), that's a huge accomplishment.

Be proud of yourself for starting to get better, and appreciate all the little improvements that happen along the way. :)
 
@alidvx I also reccomend using light dumbbells as a starting point to be able to get in some reps and build up strength from there.

Also, try varying forms of exercise to find something you like, if you are demotivated. Sports like swimming or rock climbing will give you a lot of upper body strength, too. If you do try rock climbing, do a course and learn some technique. With correct technique, a lot of it is done via pushing yourself up with your legs, not pulling with your arms. Otherwise I would guess, that you would have a bad experience again.
 
@alidvx Pilates on the mat! I've never yet met a pilates teacher who wasn't worth their weight in gold when it came to adjusting exercises to their students ability level. Find a beginner class and keep at it, they'll help you understand how your body works, and you'll pick up the know-how to engage your core and properly align your pelvis, hips and spine, which will come in invaluable when you eventually progress to more strenuous bodyweight exercises. In addition to pilates, try putting aside a half hour for dumbbell exercises at least a few times per week, switch to higher weights whenever possible -- as high as you can lift while keeping good form -- and check back in a few months, I promise you'll be surprised by how much you've progressed.
 
@alidvx I know barre seems scary for new people, but I highly recommend it if you want to build upper body strength without it being the focus. Find some really short videos on youtube focusing on upper body or whole body and try it at home. You can modify as much as you need. I find the light weight, multiple reps extremely challenging.

When I was really doing it, I progressed very quickly from barely being able to plank for 30 secs to planking for 3 minutes (~6 months).
 
@graymike91 I workout regularly and have a generally strong core, and barre kicked my ass. It was so hard! It might be a little overwhelming for someone who struggles with core strength, and it might be easy to get discouraged.

That said, I found the instructors to be really encouraging and helpful when it came to making modifications or helping you work your way up.
 
@chosen2015 Added to this - when just starting out, you can substitute household goods for dumbbells: tins of food, books, water bottles, etc. You can also use a resistance band - lay on it with the ends in line with your shoulders, grasp the ends and press.
 
@alidvx I'm in the same place. All feet and elbows, just starting to workout. I'm astonished by how much weaker my abs and shoulders are than the rest of me. I've made progress everywhere else - all on machines this far. BUT I've gotten up to an hour on the treadmill, struggled with 20 minutes a couple months ago! I keep reminding myself that it will come with time, and being stupid proud of every workout just because I showed up.

At 54, having spent my entire life sitting at a desk, it's going to take awhile to be as strong as I'd like to be.
 
@alidvx If you've never done anything like this before, this is totally normal, especially for women (less upper body strength).

The upside to all this is you be able to progress very rapidly. The better you get, the more time and intensity will be required to see any noticeable gains. r/Fitness and r/weightlifting both have excellent wikis to consult.

For your upper body, try using machines, bench press, or (preferably) dumbbells do to work on the pressing motion. Try to keep to around 3 x sets, 4-7 reps, with 2min rest in between. You're goal is to get the raw strength needed for those 5 x push ups. Once you get over 7 reps, try increasing the weight. If you can't make 4 reps with you new weight, keep adding reps until you can make the weight jump.

For your lower body, just keep practising a plank. Hold a plank until you can't anymore, rest 1min, then go again. Keep building up you reach a total of say, about 30 sec. Keep progressing until you can hold a straight plank for a minute.

Try doing push ups from your knees once a week. Soon enough, you'll be able to do so, and then you keep increasing how far out on your knees you go.
 
@alidvx No shame in starting a thing, even if it's hard to figure out where to start.Try a few of these: bird-dog, dead-bug, planks on your knees (front and side), hooklying straight leg raises (or even hooklying with bent knee marching) You can add in simple things like crunches too, which will help core control. And don't beat yourself up if it doesn't work right away.

There are some good simple exercises you can do with a Swiss Ball you might enjoy too. Once you get your core endurance and strength up, you might be surprised how the swiftly your goal progresses, even if it's not what you hoped for initially. Be patient. Human body will adapt. Or die I guess. You probably won't die from this stuff.

That said, it's not a bad idea to speak with a trainer. Find someone that listens to you and works with YOUR goals.

Good luck. Hang in there.
 
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