Issues at the gym with 2 dudes

[lazyitis]

@austinjoel2001 I suggest only talking to them if someone else is in the gym and ideally tell them what you're doing in case something happens. Especially if they are on something or bullies. They clearly are ok with cornering you if I read your post correctly. Yes be polite but put your safety first.

 

[dawn16]

@austinjoel2001 Talk to management! Personally, I would avoid those times and make a new schedule with your partner. There are weird people at every gym and it’s not worth compromising your safety. They could accidentally hit you with a weight with those movements. And I wouldn’t want to be enclosed with 2 men who are strange unless a staff member was present

 

[austinjoel2001]

@dawn16 It sucks because the gym is unstaffed after 4. I work full time about an hour from home/gym. It’s 630 by the time I get home with both kids (husbands work schedule runs late) and then it’s 845-10 ish before I’m free to get to the gym. I’m a full time grad student in my final semester so I always have some sort of hw to do. I tried going to the gym in the morning but it was hard to get to the gym and back home in time to get ready and get the kids out the door by 645 am to get to work by 8. Part of me says yes the smart thing to do is avoid them. But it’s very hard schedule wise and then part of me says why on earth should I have to change my schedule for men who can’t gather themselves to act appropriately. I’m struggling I want to move this spring so we are back in the metro area (where we originally lived, we never planned to be a commuter family but that’s just how the real estate market was when we sold and purchased a few years ago)

 

[katherinehesse]

@austinjoel2001 I’m sorry you’re having such difficulties with these buffoons while prioritizing your family & fitness. I hope talking to the gym helps. If not, throw some $ at the problem & look at other gyms so insurance won’t be a factor? There are YMCAs with great weight equipment, rates from $30ish a month and no tolerance for this type of behavior. A schedule change really sucks once you find a routine that’s working. Your commitment is super impressive.

 

[eawos]

@austinjoel2001 Does your school have a gym you can use?

 

[austinjoel2001]

@eawos Probably but it is an hour and a half from my house and 45 from my office. My classes are all online now since I’m in my field hours portion of my degree.

 

[dawn16]

@austinjoel2001 It sounds challenging!! Good luck. I think you’ll have to deal with this head on by confronting them or speaking with management. Hopefully management takes it seriously.

 

[lilith_eve]

@dawn16 If it’s an understaffed club there’s not much most will/can do. It all depends on if there are cameras and whether the club is willing to potentially lose two memberships instead of just OP’s.

I wish it wasn’t like that, it really depends on the gym owners. But it is very likely that going to management will not solve this situation.

To put it into perspective - I dealt with a situation where one member of our gym (we’ll call him Joe) wanted to get rid of another member (Tad). He said Tad was “acting weird” and “made people uncomfortable.” Tad was huge - even now he holds a ton of powerlifting records - but was also only 18 at the time. When I spoke with him, I realized very quickly he was on the Autism Spectrum and did not understand social cues. He did a lot of weird shit over the years. A lot. But where was the line? He never hurt anyone, and talking to him would usually clear stuff up.

Couple this with the fact that Joe actually left our gym and started his own. And guess who he gave a free membership to straight off the bat, so he could cultivate a high-class, prestigious name in power lifting?

Yup, Tad.

 

[dawn16]

@lilith_eve Agree that it’s totally gym dependent. My gym would deal with anything. But I’ve heard another gym in my town give a warning to someone who was being saying rascist things to another member

 

[lilith_eve]

@dawn16 It is REALLY hit or miss. Some gyms are all about community, others are completely hands-off, and some are macho/“patriotic”/bastions of shitty behavior.

That’s why I keep pushing OP to take things in her own hands before going to management. I think adding management to the equation just adds a third variable. It’s kinda like going to HR at work. They have their own agenda, they’re not necessarily your white knight.

 

[giovanni00023]

@austinjoel2001 The fact that they rarely act like this when other men are around tells me they know what they are doing. This is so scary especially at night. I would start by this reporting to management.

 

[twinmama]

@austinjoel2001 Management absolutely. If they are on something, then the police.

It's personal safety, don't feel any need to play "nice"

 

[jaz2001]

@austinjoel2001 Try and take video or pics if you can. Speak to management ASAP. This is not normal and should not be tolerated.