@sabrina_ The line that hits me hardest in this is, "I asked five questions in genetics class today and all of them started with the word 'sorry'." Because I've mentioned before that one of the most beneficial parts of lifting for me has been the transference of an 'I deserve to be here' mentality to other aspects of my life.
@whothennow24 A while back I challenged myself to say "I apologize" in place of where I would usually say "I'm sorry," in my everyday speech and thinking. It really helped me to at least recognize what situations warranted an actual expression of regret, and when I was being defferential. It helped me to stop apologizing in a subconscious effort that made me feel small and meek, and as a result I think it helped me begin to stand up for myself.
@whothennow24 That line was when I started tearing up. I'm a grad student in a STEM field and still trying to conquer confidence. This piece is fantastic.
@dawn16 You can you can you can! I'm in a stem field (postdoc) and always felt like I'm opening my mouth too much, like I'm too opinionated (I can't help myself). Nobody has ever criticised me, I just do this to myself. Then I read one of the Feynman books (I think this was 'Surely you're joking mr. Feynman') and he said that he was so excited by the science that he couldn't shut up and keep his opinions to himself. So now my attitude is that if it comes from a place of loving the science, I can't say too much. I also have embraced the fact that I'm going to be wrong often, and this has helped me keep my voice out there, even when I'm not super-sure that what I think is correct yet.
Sorry for hijacking, but I feel the need to be a cheerleader for things like this.
