Musings my s/o overheard from a trainer

[citadelseo123]

@prinkills9 How does this targeting of fat loss work? If I touch my thighs with a barbell, will I lose fat there?

 

[sevenzedek]

@citadelseo123 Just don't look at the barbell while you do it, you might bulk up overnight.

 

[fredg61]

@sevenzedek Unless the weights are pink. Then you're OK.

 

[citadelseo123]

@sevenzedek So you're telling me I need to look at the bar during deadlifts so that I can bulk up the booty?

 

[sevenzedek]

@citadelseo123 No! Don't make eye contact, you may gain a bicep!

 

[citadelseo123]

@sevenzedek Excellent! I want biceps so big that they point at the boobs that bench press is causing me to lose.

 

[fmontanay2]

@sevenzedek No, eye contact makes your eyes all muscley. That's just gross. You don't want to bulk up your eyes.

 

[childatheart88]

@fmontanay2 Maybe I do! Screw eating carrots, my next set is entirely eye contact!

 

[childatheart88]

@fmontanay2 Maybe I do! Screw eating carrots, my next set is entirely eye contact!

Edit: I dont know why this appeared twice. Apparently my eyes do need a workout.

 

[dawn16]

@citadelseo123 Well your thigh is all fat, you know. No bones. So if you do that, you're gonna be what we in the industry call ass-knee'd. Don't recommend.

 

[prinkills9]

@dawn16 It's true without fat on your thigh you'll completely loose both joints. You will be wheel chair bound.

 

[numenorian]

@prinkills9 I hate this shit. I am seriously starting to think a person shouldn't be able to get a training cert without at least an associates in a related science. I'm not even a degree snob. I never finished mine and I do pretty damn well for myself. I just can't believe the lack of regulation that creates a situation where this ass hat gets to give clients bull shit nutritional and exercise science advice, with likely little more than 6 hours of training.

 

[lindseyloux3]

@numenorian This is exactly why I haven't committed to a trainer (my first and last experience was so bad, I bailed after 4 sessions with 3 different people - the gym couldn't get their act together). 90% of the advice they gave me seemed good but then 10% was contradictory to what one of their own colleagues had said.

I'm an idiot. I don't know what the hell I'm doing in the gym and I'm just flailing about and hoping it helps me. I've lost 40 pounds that way. But I have gotten to the point where I want to get serious about fat loss/muscle gain and I have no clue who to trust to help me. Argh.

 

[dawn16]

@numenorian I think the gym is to blame here. There are plenty of good certifications that require a lot of study and knowledge- and plenty of personal trainers out there. I'm pretty sure even the lowest certification would touch on the fact that you can't spot reduce.

 

[haldog]

@numenorian I would like to point out that even people with PhDs and MDs can be total morons.

 

[maryandkate]

@haldog I work at an answering service and deal with a large number of doctors. Can confirm.

 

[numenorian]

@haldog True, and I know a few who fit that description, but most people who study kinesiology, physical therapy, dietetics, sports medicine, or a related field, will have at least a basic understanding of how things like fat loss and muscle building work.

 

[sevenzedek]

@numenorian I study kinesiology with the intent of going into nursing, and trust me, you would not believe the amount of people in my major that don't understand calories in/calories out and think that weight training is bad/will make women bulky. Exercise physiology was a sad class.

 

[hayas]

@haldog Yeah, I think it would be best to make certification more difficult and evidence-based, requiring continuing education.

 

[dawn16]

@prinkills9 Man, I WISH bench press would shrink my boobs!