Your body is someone else’s goal

@dem4 I feel the same. No ED here, but am far too under weight. If my body is your goal, you need to reassess your goals. Thin doesn't mean healthy.
 
@incarnation Exactly, thin =/= healthy. I almost feel like I'm lying to everyone who sees my body at the gym, because none of what I've got going on is healthy and it certainly didn't happen in the gym. I don't want anyone to want to be like me, and I definitely don't want to contribute to the already warped perceptions out there about body image, weight loss, and exercise. I don't feel good in my skin, I didn't lose weight from working out, and if anything I use the gym to help restore my hunger cues and get me eating more.
 
@dem4 I haven’t been formally diagnosed, but I have an eating disorder where I restrict heavily when I’m stressed or depressed or otherwise under pressure. I am so incredibly uncomfortable when people compliment my body because I know how unhappy and unhealthy it is.

The thing is that I am very much closeted, most folks I know think I eat carefully and have a very active life, but really I’m exercising to try to stem the panic attacks and my beach body is makes me so tired I can barely function.

I guess What I’m saying is that hear you and those feelings are very valid and I share them.
 
@nickofmyra Ah, same here. It’s pretty disconcerting too when people compliment how “good I look now” and I’m like yeah gee thanks my anxiety, depression and a relapse from an eating disorder got me here.

It also sucks because this is a lower weight for me and I always have a tendency for the pendulum to swing the other way where I go into binge mode, and gain all the weight back. So I know the weight I’m at now is not sustainable, and that means I don’t look “good” when I gain anything back which makes me feel like shit at any other weight besides my low weight.

It’s been a constant struggle for the past seven years, and I really just don’t like people commenting on my weight at all because no matter what they say I feel offended. You look great? Thanks I starved to get here. You look healthy/I love your curves? Thanks I’m a fat whale.

It’s terrible how fucked my brain is when it comes to my body and food. I don’t think I’ll ever be normal again.

Just wanted to say I sympathize with you. Shit sucks.
 
@nickofmyra Thank you for this reply! I totally echo the sentiments about being closeted - only a few people very close to me know about my disorder, and it feels so horrible and disingenuous when others think I'm so healthy when the reality is so different. Exercise is so important to me for my recovery (exercise helps with anxiety tremendously), but it almost feels like I'm being dishonest or something for people in a healthy place to see me this way.

Best of luck with your struggles, and thank you again for sharing that.
 
@twallacejolly You go girl !!!

Leggings and sports bra are the boooomb !

Being able to see my abs tense properly on squats helped me so much more. I could actually see if I was bracing or not, and improved my form by miles just because of the outfit.
 
@twallacejolly That’s something that I’d love to be able to do but I just can’t bring myself to. Definitely not now that I have gained some weight and I don’t feel as confident :(
 
@seward14 I'm tiny and I could NEVER wear only a sports bra in a gym. Don't feel bad! The clothes you wear don't make your workout less.

Edit: also just because one person is comfortable in leggings and a sports bra doesn't mean everyone can be. My preferred workout gear is leggings and a bigass t shirt. I know the message is positive but I also feel like it's kind of saying that women who don't dress in sports bras aren't confident. And I think it's important to say that you should wear what makes you comfortable, not what you think you are supposed to wear.
 
@louelie Lol I feel the same way. A sports bra is still a BRA and in my mind will always be underwear. I've even looked wonderingly at the reflective strips thinking why would anyone want those? For reference most women, no matter how fit, will wear some kind of t-shirt or vest over their sports bra where I live. These same people will have no problem wearing bathing suit or bikini.
 
@louelie Omg I so didn't mean it that way! I'm sorry it came across that way.

I would never ever wear anything but leggings or pants cause I am terrified of my bare skin touching anything. Doesn't mean I hate my legs because I don't feel comfortable working out in shorts. I just know that for me, I WANTED to wear just a sports bra or a fitted top because the extra material was seriously bothering me and my hangups about my body were keeping me from a better workout. I worked out in shorts once and found I was way too worried about my vagina popping out or my legs touching things that I had the opposite problem. But! Plenty of girls like working out in shorts!

I just want people to be happy lol
 
@twallacejolly That’s a big step, I’m happy you took the leap and had a great workout!

The first time I wore a sports bra with no shirt overtop, I paced around the locker room for a good 15 minutes trying to convince myself I could do it. It’s definitely scary, but it feels amazing to overcome the fear and own it :)
 
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