@nickofmyra Ah, same here. It’s pretty disconcerting too when people compliment how “good I look now” and I’m like yeah gee thanks my anxiety, depression and a relapse from an eating disorder got me here.
It also sucks because this is a lower weight for me and I always have a tendency for the pendulum to swing the other way where I go into binge mode, and gain all the weight back. So I know the weight I’m at now is not sustainable, and that means I don’t look “good” when I gain anything back which makes me feel like shit at any other weight besides my low weight.
It’s been a constant struggle for the past seven years, and I really just don’t like people commenting on my weight at all because no matter what they say I feel offended. You look great? Thanks I starved to get here. You look healthy/I love your curves? Thanks I’m a fat whale.
It’s terrible how fucked my brain is when it comes to my body and food. I don’t think I’ll ever be normal again.
Just wanted to say I sympathize with you. Shit sucks.