My spin instructor made me cry!

@cepha Different things speak differently to different people. This instructor isn't your flavor. Don't feel bad about that.. go to a different one.

Its interesting. I train in competitive long range rifle shooting - my coach is my bf (he was a collegiate level coach for over a decade and a competitor in college and as an adult). He is very blunt, he pushes me. Another guy he coaches who trains with us on Sundays and who was an NFL defender came up to me once and told me to not worry about how hard he was being on my (my bf). It made me laugh a little because this guy who had played for the Patriots kinda knows what it is like to be under harsh coaching. So I am GOOD with that kind of coaching for something that I want to be competitive at... I would NOT tolerate it for something that is just for exercise aka I am NOT trying to be the best spin class student ever.

But in spin, I like a balance... I have a peloton I love classes done by Robin Arzon.. she pushes me without a lot of fluff. I don't really like some classes done by other instructors who I think are way too yay yay you can do it!!! get it!!!
 
@cepha I’ve been doing spin classes for 10+ years and there are ALWAYS instructors that I just won’t take. It’s rude and unprofessional, just take other classes.
 
@cepha There’s absolutely a difference between a tough teacher and an abusive one. My favorite spin teacher is HARD. She yells. She swears. She tells me not to bullshit myself and to work harder and that the strength is in the struggle. She doesn’t belittle anybody. Does she call people out? Yes. By name. And only when she knows you. And then she supports the call out with praise. Like “yes baby girl, take that breath and then keep going. Push push push!” And we respond. Her classes regularly have 75 people in them. I cry every time but it’s catharsis, not shame or embarrassment.

Ugh I’m so mad at that teacher. This isn’t what a tough teacher should be. Please do tell management that the instructor crossed the line and instead of a tough challenging class it was abusive. Reiterate that you know instructors have different styles but they were disrespectful and dangerous and belittling. A “boot camp” style warning isn’t gonna cut it if this is normal for this teacher. Boot camp should be tough! Not abusive.
 
@cepha You said that most other people in the class were quiet. I've taken plenty of classes and my biggest observation is that if the instructor is well-liked, members will interact and vocally respond. If they aren't, most members just try to keep their heads down and ignore them so they can just get their workout in because maybe that's the only time slot they can make that day.

I teach spin, aqua aerobics, boot camp, and HIIT. I would never speak to any class member this way. It's repulsive. I take on a different tone and energy for different types of classes, sure. For instance, in HIIT I play music with a high BPM, I'm louder, more direct, and I am a bundle of constantly moving high energy. Meanwhile, in aqua, I turn on some motown and tone it all down a notch, more smiles and joke cracking. But no matter what, I am constantly encouraging and pushing with positive motivation.

And I would never point out an individual member in a negative light. Ever. If someone is struggling, I might turn off my mic and check on them, see if I can offer a modified exercise, but never in a manner to shame them. Unless a trainer is working with someone one-on-one who has requested negative reinforcement, that isn't a style of teaching, it's rude.

I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. If you're ever in Orange County, CA, you're more than welcome to any of my classes! And I agree with everyone suggesting you report her to management.
 
@cepha A teacher like this made me give up Tae Kwon Do.

I used to have an amazing and sweet tae kwon do teacher. I stayed for 5 years and loved it. She really pushed us, but in the best way. She made us stronger without taking anything away.

Then I moved cities and the only local option was a club at a university. The teacher was exactly like how you described. Shame was his main motivational tactic. He did his best to make us feel like we were not valued and not good enough. He called us names, everything. It didn't help that I was the only girl AND out of shape. I got to the point where every breath I took wheezed audibly (it was so embarrassing) and he ripped into me in front of the entire class - of men bigger and stronger than me - and said I'd be dead in the "real world." I never went back. I was never able to pick up the art again.

Shame is not motivation. We are not going to pay money to feel worthless.
 
@cepha I had a cycle instructor who was de-motivating but not as bad as what you described. She would say “I’m really proud of y’all, you’re working so hard,” and then a few seconds later, “Just kidding y’all know I don’t actually care.” What is the point of that? Trying to show us you’re too cool to give a damn about the people who show up to work out with you every week? I switched to a different instructor and they eventually dropped the other one from the studio.
 
@breeze11 Yes she actually said “you guys should know I don’t care” to the class several times. I didn’t know if she meant she doesn’t care about her students, or she doesn’t care about complaints, or what but she never went into detail.
 
@dynamitex They should care. They should want you to get the most out of the class so you keep coming back. They should want you to enjoy the class so you keep coming back. And they should want you to feel good about yourself after a class so you keep coming back.
 
@cepha The instructor clearly wants everyone to admire her own physical and fitness prowess and has zero concern or hopes that you guys are feeling good and getting healthier. Since her comments come from a place of insecurity and narcissistic behavior, that has NO reflection on you as a person. Try not to take it personally. I'm so sorry.🖤
 
@cepha Please report her to management! There’s a difference between a tough instructor (which is a super acquired taste) and an asshole, and her saying that y’all sucked and to shut up is definitely asshole territory.
 
@cepha I am an avid spin participant at multiple studios and I have NEVER had an instructor like that. They’re supposed to be uplifting and encouraging you to go at your own pace (especially the new members), not berating you to overwork yourself.

Please report her to the manager or at least share your experience with others. This is not okay and if people are quiet in the class I am sure you are not the only one who did not enjoy this.
 
@cepha I agree with the others- report this to management!

I guarantee you’re not the only one who had flashbacks to childhood or other traumas. I guarantee you’re not the only one who didn’t feel good about it. The people who did... probably left, and never came back. That’s what happens.

If you wanted that kind of thing, it should be spelled out clearly. That is how informed consent works! Without informed consent, it turns into just abuse.

Those who like it will appreciate being told that it exists for them. Those who don’t will appreciate being able to avoid it.
 
@cepha I can appreciate your reaction, especially with your childhood experiences. Her style is very aggressive and off-putting but I also know people whom find it to be very motivating. Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Personally, if I wanted a drill Sargent, I would have joined the military. Whenever I attend a new class (yoga, zumba or otherwise) and am not enjoying it, I simply walk out especially if there are other options available.
 
@cepha This is absolutely not okay and I recommend reaching out to management/the owner of the spin studio. I’ve done something similar after I had an instructor yelling in a high-pitched voice and spinning just way too damn fast. There are nice ways for you to express to the owner how this instructor made you feel and how that’s the opposite of what you want to experience when you’re exercising. I’m sorry this happened!
 
@cepha Like you, I come from an abusive background. I do not tolerate being yelled at. I won’t have it around me. If you ever find yourself in a position like this again, I want you to know you can fire the instructor. Right then, right there, you can get off that bike or put down those weights, grab your water bottle and walk out that door. You can walk right up to a manager or owner and tell them about the experience you had: you went from excited to working out and pushing through a challenge because the instructor it only yelled at you but encouraged a negative environment. You are the boss, the instructor is the client you pay for service. People don’t realize the truth of the relationship and think the instructor is “in charge.” Nope: you’re in charge, that instructor needs clients.

There are some people who love to be yelled at by instructors. There are people who seek out a “bootcamp” style fitness and others looking for a “dom/sub” trainer/client situation. I’ve seen instructors or coaches who seem of get off on that sort of behavior or feel like their job is to “beat” the client. I own a gym, do group fitness and personal training, and every now and again I’ll get a complaint “the instructor didn’t abuse/motivate/yell enough.” My response is always the same: our group environment is meant to be encouraging, supportive and motivating, but we don’t yell. If you need something different and more aggressive, you’re going to want to find another gym, we don’t do that here.”

The gym or studio should be a space where you can focus on your health, physical and mental. If you do voice your concerns to management and they don’t have encouraging feedback for you, consider voting with your wallet. Find your favorite instructors, ask if they teach elsewhere, and go there.
 
@tiktok North of Boston but it's closed for the time being. We're allowed to be open but I can't find the proper cleaning equipment and materials to set it up how I think is safest, so much is backordered or just straight up unavailable.
 

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