How do I tell a girl in the gym to leave me alone without hurting her feelings?

[cheapwifey]

@renierbajala I do this as well, and it works very well.

Decent people of either gender back off with their flirting if you tell them you're not available. A person who doesn't, is a person I don't need to be considerate with.

 

[renierbajala]

@cheapwifey Exactly!!!

 

[mitavittuanytkunetteanna]

@jeannie36 You need to switch gyms

 

[dawn16]

@jeannie36 Just be blunt. You need something. If she takes offense to you needing something and her not wanting that, that’s on her.

You don’t need to be mean, just be honest and let her know that socialize time isn’t what you’re looking for.

 

[sharne]

@jeannie36 Every time she asks you a work out related question, tell her that you’re uncomfortable giving fitness direction and that she should ask the staff.

 

[greysonphil]

@jeannie36

How do I tell a girl in the gym to leave me alone without hurting her feelings

I don't think you can :/.

 

[jwilliams35]

@greysonphil You can, it's called being tactful.

 

[roseofsharon1980]

@jwilliams35 I think rejection always hurts a little even if it's tactful. If she isn't a psycho, though, it will be temporary

 

[dawn16]

@roseofsharon1980 It doesn’t have to hurt you tho. You’re just removing the “what if”. Flirting should not be an assessment of your worth.

I mean I have a big ego but it’s faster to move on when he says that he’s not interested.

 

[jwilliams35]

@roseofsharon1980 It's about what you say and how you say it.
He could say hey thanks for thinking I know so much about the gym but I'm honestly a novice and I prefer to just keep to myself and focus on my exercises while I'm at the gym. So if you wouldn't mind try not to start a conversation with me while I'm in the middle of things.
Something like that, where the focus is on him, is much less hurtful then straight up telling her to leave him alone or don't talk to him.

 

[roseofsharon1980]

@jwilliams35 Less hurtful, for sure, but still a little embarrassing to learn you've been bothering a dude you're into. Maybe that's just me.

 

[jwilliams35]

@roseofsharon1980 Well he either says something not so harsh now before he gets so irritated he blows up and it gets to be a bad situation.

 

[roseofsharon1980]

@jwilliams35 I'm saying that some hurt feelings are unavoidable, not that he shouldnt try to minimize the impact. Jeesh.

 

[alamal1]

@jeannie36 It sucks, but sometimes you just have to suffer through. If it's just one quick conversation between sets, it's annoying, but no one's getting hurt. There's a dude in my gym that is the same. He comes over and says hey, tells me about his weekend, maybe shows me a picture of his dog. He's really so nice. On days I literally don't have time, I tell him I'm late for work. It cuts me loose. Other days, I suffer him, because I'm in a better mood or I am feeling social or I have a lot of extra time that day. Side note though, I think it's pretty cool of you to come here and ask, no matter what route you take.

 

[charlener]

@jeannie36 Does she try to make conversation, or is she literally just asking you an impersonal question, listening to your answer, and then thanking you and walking away?

If she’s trying to make conversation and using a question as her opening move, either wear headphones, act really into your work out, and avoid her, or just tell her that she seems cool but the gym is your me-time and that you’re not interested in a gym buddy.

If she’s just asking a quick question with no effort to turn it into a conversation, just answer politely and get back to your workout. It costs you literally nothing to say “I think it’s 7:15.”

 

[camcraw]

@charlener I agree with everything until the last bit - OP is specifically asking for advice on not to be bothered at all. I get it, when I go the the gym I want to bang out a sesh and then get out. If she is asking him silly questions like the time WHEN THERE ARE CLOCKS ON THE WALL then he should just say, politely, “I think it’s [time]?” while pointing at the clock. If she does it again, just point at the clock.

 

[colleenz]

@jeannie36 Perhaps you could tell her that you're not the best person to ask about form and point her to another guy who seems to be more experienced.

 

[luizubel]

@colleenz i like this one