Kid refused to spot me today, so I returned the favor

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aeri20

New member
For context, me and some kid (probably 17) arrived at the gym at the same time. I started bench pressing. I saw him eye me up as he was in the corner doing arm circles.

I normally do 5-6 sets and it takes about 15 mins. Kid asks me if I’m almost done, midway through set 4. I say 2 more. He rolls his eyes and goes back to stretching. As I’m on my last set, I call him over and say ‘hey, this is my last one, do you mind spotting me real quick?’

He says ‘I don’t even know you’ with an attitude and walks away and takes his hoodie off.

I end my set and don’t even acknowledge him.

Later, as I’m doing pec flys I look over in the corner of the room and he’s failing on 115. I just looked away. Guess you gotta learn the hard way.

Edit: the kid was more than capable of getting the weight off in a safe manner. If he actually would have been in danger, yes, I would’ve spotted him.
 
@aeri20 Ha ha, I'm with OP. Too many people start as douches, stay as douches, and people keep letting them get away with it free of repercussions. The poor dummy had to fail on 115 and tilt it off his chest, big whoop. If OP had helped, the kid probably would have taken it for granted and carried on same as before. A lot of you are being a bit virtuous, I think. Speaking of making yourself feel better
 
@wpage I think coming over and saying “Hey buddy, need a spot?” and then helping the weight off him with a shit-eating grin on your face would go a long way towards correcting this kid’s attitude
 
@amethyst87 Good point. Wasted opportunity of a teachable moment. You could have led by example OP. The kid probably would’ve felt like a real shitheel if you were the one to come bail him out when he needed it. On the other hand I don’t think what you did was wrong or anything, maybe just not optimal.
 
@wpage Alternatively (playing devil's advocate for the sake of discussion) he might have felt like a douche for not helping him. Imo helping him would have given him the chance to feel like a douche, not helping gives him the chance to feel justified in not helping op. Thoughts?
 
@amandabroken I think it's funny he got stuck, and more importantly I think he's old enough it's his choice what lessons he chooses to take from life, and not OP's responsibility to be some guiding light
 
@aeri20 I like a good gym tale lol. Not sure why everyone is being so fucking serious about it.

I have my home gym so I can avoid obnoxious people, but I still occasionally go with my wife to our local gym for a change of pace. Most of the younger kids are pretty good with gym etiquette.

I have an opposite type story...when I went to that specific gym more frequently, there was a kid probably 16-17 that would ask me for a spot occasionally on bench. I stopped going there for awhile and solely used my home gym (over a year), came back, and he's still there, big as shit now... saw each other, gave the "nod" and I was thinking nice work man.
 
@aeri20 The cringiest thing to me is that the kid probably felt cool and alpha from saying "i don't even know you"

100% would've ignored him also. Right thing to do.

For the record I would spot anyone who asks me to spot them, but if you can't do the kittlest thing for me Fuck off
 
@aeri20 You edited to say you were joking you would have spotted him if he needed it, perhaps in response to some comments here.

At 115 pounds he can A choose to hurt himself.(if he does at that weight he doesn't have the slightest clue what he should be doing)

Or B. Go do something else without the spotter.

Nobody owes anybody anything and with the attitude he reciprocated to OP, if he hurts himself thats on himself.

OP would not be an asshole for repeating the same line back to him.

And clearly in this scenario kid would never have even asked for a spotter. He'd just try, fail, then roll the bar off sideways extremely embarrassingly, and it'd be a lesson learned. Probably wouldn't bench again for a year

At 115 he's not going to crush his esophagus.
 
@aeri20 A better move would have been to spot him and then just say "you know me now" and walk away which everything explodes behind you, but do you look back? No. No, you're too cool for that.
 
@aeri20 On another note, there is no way I'm letting some 17 year old noobie spot me on bench press if I can avoid it. Even a lot of experienced adults are shitty spotters, but the chances are just way too high with the new kid. I can see it now: either my shoulder giving out, or getting needlessly assisted when I could grind out 3 more
 
@pastorpontibus Would you rather asked the obviously experienced swole/strong person to spot you at the gym or the kid who failed 115 on bench?

Dude said “if I can avoid it”, and I guarantee you’d also not pick the kid who seems less experienced/standoffish than someone who clearly knows their way around the gym.

I wouldn’t ask someone brand new to spot my heavy bench sets either. It is what it is. If I’m calling for a spot I need to be at least fairly sure the person knows what they’re doing.
 
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