My roommates keep calling me gym obsessed.

[gudjen]

@kmar123 You’re fine. You don’t spend too much time there. Ignore them. Or move out and find new roommates from the gym.

Are you young? Just curious. I’m in my mid-30s and I do not give a shit what anyone says, including my toxic family, when they say I run too much and I will have knee problems. As you get older, you’ll learn to ignore what people think and just do what makes you happy.

 

[kmar123]

@gudjen I turned 27 this year but two of my roommates are still in their early 20s and uni students. there’s quite a gap there, not just age wise but also in our routines and lifestyle. I feel quite disconnected from them all, even from the other roommate that’s the same age as me and I 100% plan to move out next year. So I just want to keep the peace until then. Hopefully learn not to give a crap as well :’) I’m jealous of that skill!

 

[gudjen]

@kmar123 Yeah, your roommates sound like young bratty twats. Something about turning 30 really turns up that internal IDGAF meter.

 

[johnhenrygroenewald]

@kmar123 Yeah - I've gotten shit for working out too much and I spend less than 3 hours/week at the gym.

I think people assume that if exercise is a priority to you (as in, more important than Netflix), then it's an addiction. A lot of people can't understand that some people actually do enjoy working out, and to them it seems like you're forcing yourself to do something you hate.

At the end of the day - we can't control what other people say or think. Let them think what they want about you. If it makes them feel better about themselves to think you're addicted, then that's fine too. Not your problem.

 

[kmar123]

@johnhenrygroenewald yeah that’s totally it! They see it as forcing myself to do something I hate, I think. I am going to try to express more how much I enjoy it from now on.

Funny bc I’ve watched like, all of Netflix, and no one says I’m obsessed haha. And yeah, at the end, not my problem easier said than done not to care but it’s important that I try.

 

[peacefulpanic]

@kmar123 A lot of people make fun of people who like working out to make themselves feel better about the fact that they don’t . It probably isn’t about you. It’s about their own insecurity. Fuck ‘em. Do what makes you feel good, laugh off their judgement and remember that you’re the one they’re jealous of.

 

[wisdomofthefaith]

@kmar123 Lots of people build their self esteem on comparison. They like to surround themselves with people who are similar to them, judge people who they think are "worse" than them on a given issue, and envy/dislike people that they think are "better" than them. You've made some pretty big changes in your exercise and drinking habits, so not only do you have less in common with them but they may feel threatened by it as well.

Nothing in what you mention sounds like overkill. Go to the gym, drink less and be happy. If they continue to be weird about it or get mean then you can always move out. It's really common to have these kind of shifts in your 20's (which I'm assuming you are) as you grow and change. Look forward to meeting friends and potentially roommates who share more of your values and goals.

 

[markvs]

@kmar123 I came home with some discount protein shakes that were normally very expensive, and when I showed my roommate all she said was “I don’t recognize that brand, but I guess I’m not a health freak”... I come home 3-4 a week with fast food and workout 4-5 times a week, so I’m not sure where she got that.

I find people who don’t share the same passion for something see it as obsessive, when in reality it’s one of the healthier hobbies. They may be projecting, or not understand how it helps mentally.

 

[kmar123]

@markvs yeah I can totally see how having different hobbies could be perceived as obsessive or negative. And it’s kinda sad that I’m being “called out” for working out consistently but when I used to drink heavily no one said anything.

 

[bragar]

@kmar123 Honestly, screw your roommates! If it makes you happy who cares what they say! I used to have the same issue with some of my friends, but when the pandemic hit and my gym closed, my friends noticed a personality change in me (I use the gym as a stress reliever). So then they started saying “when are you going back to the gym?!”

Now that gyms are reopen and I’m back to my old routine they don’t say much. So basically just let them say whatever they want, they may change their tune when they realize they don’t like a non-gym rat you haha!

 

[solomonthepoor]

@kmar123 My friends in high school tried to stop me from going running (i was on track and xc teams). Sometimes people just don’t get it and you have to practice using your boundaries and not giving af. Good luck. Also always remember the only time you can build muscle is while in rest and recovery.
(that’s how I tell myself that rest days are good! they are the most important)

 

[dawn16]

@kmar123 Would it be weird if I asked around what age group you’re all in? When I was in college/early 20s, some of my friends had this perception that gym was either for losing weight/suffering or for gym rats/bunnies only. It seems like their perception of gym/working out is just outdated af. I’d suggest ignoring them or looking into new roommates in the future. Do you girl.

 

[kmar123]

@dawn16 We are four girls - two of us are 27 and the other two are three years younger. There’s definitely a gap beyond age since me and the other 27yo are full time workers and the younger two are still uni students. The girl my age is the “meanest” of them all though (don’t really want to call her mean.. just very blunt sometimes) and is the one that told me I have a serious addiction.

 

[dawn16]

@kmar123 Ugh sorry, this just sounds toxic. I’m sorry they got second guessing your health and routine. If it’s any consolation, it seems the consensus is you’re fine and they’re just trying to drag you down (for whatever reason). Try to ignore, not answer their questions (“what are you doing today?” “Hmm, not sure, see your later bye” and then bounce), and maybe move out when you can.

 

[dippenj]

@kmar123 kasey musgraves said: youre damned if you dk and youre damned if you don't so, might as well JuSt Do WhAtEvEr YoU wAnT..

 

[onechristianlight]

@kmar123 No one will make fun of someone they think is in a worse position than them. Usually this behaviour comes from their own insecurities. Everything you’re doing is fine. They wish they had your dedication and it makes them feel bad about themselves. That’s all it is. Stick with it

 

[caradavina]

@kmar123 Ppl with no hobbies saying you're addicted to your hobby. P R O J E C T I O N

 

[pastorben]

@kmar123 It seems like the “crab in the bucket” mentality to me. That and/or they are self conscious about their own habits.

 

[rileyargo]

@kmar123 This sounds like a totally reasonable amount of exercise for someone who's into fitness. Not excessive at all, you're listening to your recovery cues and doing a range of different activities to encourage mobility, balance, flexibility, cardiorespiratory development and strength.

Your roommates just feel guilty because your dedication exposes their laziness. They're projecting their own self-guilt onto you. I would ignore them or tell them straight up they're projecting their own shit onto you.

 

[dawn16]

@kmar123 So my dad is actually addicted to working out. Like, if you google "gym addiction" and look at the symptoms, he fits them all. The only time he's ever intentionally skipped a workout was when he got his finger cut off in a snowblower and spent the night in the hospital getting it stitched back up. Oh, that and when he threw his back out and spent the morning pacing around the house because he couldn't bend over to tie his gym shoes.

He knows he has a problem. He takes a rest day every Tuesday because he plays tennis late on Monday night, but even taking that day off every week took a while to work up to.

His biggest tell is his mood. Aside from his planned rest day once a week, if there's ever a situation where he cannot workout on a planned workout day, his mood is affected for that whole day. He's quiet at dinner, more short with coworkers than usual, seems tired, goes to bed early that night.

Your five days a week might be all fine and dandy, but what if you can't workout on one of those planned days? Do your roommates notice your mood shift?

I don't want to project my own experiences onto your situation with my dad, and on the flip side I've certainly had periods of my life where I was working out 6 days a week for 2+ hours a day but wasn't actually addicted to working out. But to me at least, the big difference between people who do have a gym problem and those that don't are they way they act on days where they can't workout when they typically would.

It seems like this is something that's really bothering you, so maybe take some time to mull the comments over and then go talk to your roommates. If they're your friends, they're probably just worried about you, which is something that a good hangout session with some deep talks can do wonders for.