Of all the places I have looked for self love, I had no idea I would find it at the gym

[dominatio]

@bill01 Beautiful. I can relate to everything you said, just short of you “today”. So many of the things you described from your past are where I’ve been, even as recently as last week.

I’m not there 100%, but I can’t wait to get where you are today.

 

[edgarcia92]

@bill01 I needed to read this today. Thank you for posting

 

[genuinelyseeking]

@bill01 I relate to this so strongly. I’m so happy you feel the same way!

 

[laeomis]

@bill01 I feel like this was written for me

 

[harpazo56]

@bill01 Hell yeah girl! I’m currently going through a similar process at the gym, I’m not happy with my progress yet but the feelings of increased strength and the sore muscles afterwards make me feel so much accomplishment and satisfaction

 

[ames96]

@bill01 Where else did you look for self love? Asking for a friend.

 

[genuinelyseeking]

@ames96 Not op, but I’ve started taking myself on dates. I’ll go to a coffee shop for an hour, have a cup of coffee, and read. It’s a weekly tradition that I MAKE happen. It’s given me a lot of comfort with being by myself and being ok with that.
I dress up and treat it like a real date - I don’t look at my phone and I truly think about what I want to do. Usually it is getting a cup of coffee and reading, but sometimes it’s a movie or a walk or looking at dresses at the mall.

I also don’t make self depreciating jokes ever. If I write something bad, I say “move over, Salinger” or if I drop something I say I’m ready for baseball season. It really has improved my self talk. It’s just as good at diffusing the embarrassment but it lets you practice being kind to myself.

 

[jmorgan10513]

@genuinelyseeking Wow, the self-deprecating jokes advice is for real! Going to try this

 

[genuinelyseeking]

@jmorgan10513 Self talk is everything! I really hope it helps!

 

[rawo]

@bill01 This is beautiful and inspirational. Go you!

 

[tuanbuffalo01]

@bill01 Let me add that this can happen at any age too. I started learning how to lift when I was 55. I am now 61 and very, very strong because I lift heavy 3x a week and do krav maga once a week. I stopped feeling bad about my body (finally!!!) and I revel in my strength. I encourage everyone to learn how to lift heavy weights.

 

[lightwriter]

@bill01 I needed to read this today, thank you!! I threw out my scale the other day and actually cried afterwards. The journey from self-loathing to enjoying what your body can do can take a long time, but it’s worth it.

 

[gordonmarry]

@bill01 Yes, yes, yes!!! When I first started going to the gym I thought to myself, “ Well when I look like those really fit and slim ladies, then I’ll buy the tank tops or leggings.” But once I started making my own gains, my self confidence really grew and I was like, “forgot that! I’m getting the gym clothes I want now in spite of not being at my goal weight! I think I feel and look great now!” Love that it wasn’t about what others might be thinking of me, it was what I thought about me that mattered.

 

[tiiira]

@bill01 Thanks, I needed to hear this. I’m just starting out weight lifting (last week) again and am loathing my body right now.

I have a vacation coming up in May and am kind of secretly hoping I can lose enough so that I look good in photos, but I’m slowly learning it’s ok if I don’t because this is a journey and that the end goal is just a perk.

Also, my end goal may change as my body changes with weight lifting, and that’s ok, too!

I’m trying so hard to change my perspective from “lose weight quickly” to “lose weight sustainably”.

Hearing these positive things from everyone on this sub really makes me motivated to do it right the first time and not get discouraged from the slow progress! Thank you!

 

[bill01]

@tiiira Oh I am excited for you. Congratulations on getting started. For me that was the hardest part, and the final push actually came from an impending beach vacation.

I remember deleting a few pictures from the trip because I hated how I looked in a swimsuit. I wish more than anything I felt how I do now and appreciated my body. It would be nice to be able to look at those memories and appreciate that spot in my journey. It was honestly the hardest part, those first couple months when I wanted to be at the finish line so badly.

Again congratulations on getting started. Keep up the great work, and I hope you have a wonderful vacation!

 

[tiiira]

@bill01 Thanks! It is hard getting started, haha. But I’m just trying to keep the mindset that everyone sucks at everything when they first start doing something. No one is naturally good at it.

Also, I’m concentrating on my lifts and my diet instead of the weight. Hoping that I can just magically shed the weight without looking at the scale, haha.

 

[elissanjuice]

@bill01 Preach girl!!! I'm still getting there but the part about sticking with it and it changing your life, I feel you. My friends might think I'm insane but it's the best thing that's ever happened to me.

 

[ephraimite]

@bill01 Yesterday I was finishing a round of lifting with some cardio. I had a realization at the end of it that I didn’t look at the calories burned section once- just the distance, because I’ve been working on improving my cardiovascular health. These shifts in focus have happened ever since I started focusing on strength training and eating to fuel me. It’s like a domino effect when I started focusing on health and feeling strong than losing weight and looking good (the latter has followed). From my own experience and all the posts like this on this sub, I’m convinced that taking up strength training is probably the best thing a woman can do for herself.

 

[bill01]

@ephraimite

I’m convinced that taking up strength training is probably the best thing a woman can do for herself.

I too want to hype the shit out of strength training. Feeling strong is fucking amazing. Pretty sure all my friends are a little confused, but seriously it changed my life by shifting my perspective. I know some people have that with other forms of fitness, but this is the first time for me.

So happy to hear so many others have had a similar experience. Really wish I could share it with everyone I meet.

 

[dawn16]

@bill01 I’m hoping to be like you, honestly. I can’t find the drive to get to the gym and I am completely LOST when it comes to lifting... I don’t know where to start or what regime to follow. If you have any suggestions, that would be amazing. Thanks for sharing your story