Rant about people trying to look skinny or have a x inch waist

[crosswalk1991]

I’m so sick of reading posts about trying to cinch the waistline or get to a weight that’s beyond lower than the healthy weight you’re already at. This is a FITNESS sub. Focus on HEALTH. Focus on strength. Focus on nutrition. Sure we’re here to look a certain way and lose fat, but the main point is our health. Focus on getting stronger and FEELING great.

Ultimately, we are all sexy in all shapes and sizes. Love your body. Love your belly and your booty and your love handles. Two different girls at 130 lbs at the same height can look drastically different. One can be too heavy, the other can be bottom heavy. One can look extremely muscular and lean, and the other can be soft and curvy. Both can have clean bills of health and still build muscles and endurance. Both girls are beautiful. Stop comparing yourself to others. Compare yourself today to yourself yesterday, and strive for a better YOU.

Edit: so many of you made amazing points!

One of the comments in particular pointed out that comparing yourself to yesterday kind of sucks too. And I agree! Don’t compare your 30s body with your 20s body. I meant it in a way that is, Strive for consistency and a better health as best as you can.

Edit2: I’m 5’4, 145 lbs, 27% bodyfat, and a powerlifter. I can bench 135, squat 225, and deadlift 285. My goal is to get shredded and strong. I also do HIIT 3x a week, can run a sub 8 minute mile, ran 5k’s , 10k’s, and one half marathon (okay to be fair, most of my half marathon was a walk). I have abs if I flex my stomach, but I still have belly fat, arm fat, leg fat, and whatever fat. Guess what, I love it. My waist is a 28-29, and it’s amazing.

It’s so much better for your health and metabolism to eat enough, STILL EXERCISE (weights and cardio), rather than restricting and only cardio.

 

[pitterricherd]

@crosswalk1991 In my 20s, I couldn't run for more than a few minutes at a time. Now at 32 I'm gearing up for my first half marathon next weekend

Plus now I can swim (literally did not know how until last year ) and I lift weights though not yet quite heavy lifting. That is the progress I aim for

 

[crosswalk1991]

@pitterricherd Hell yeah! I love this kind of stuff. Fitness and NSV goals.

 

[melodyyy101]

@pitterricherd I’m in my mid 20s and it’s my dream to run a marathon some day, I used to love running as a kid but can barely go longer than 3 minutes now. This was great motivation thank you!

 

[gregorybnorman]

@pitterricherd I need this mind set and motivation

 

[tavares]

@crosswalk1991 This sub can be so exhausting because I feel like most of my time here is spent trying to convince people to eat above their BMR and stop hating things about their bodies they probably can’t change. The r/xxfitness sub has a rule regarding no posts about weight loss and it makes it a much nicer experience.

 

[crosswalk1991]

@tavares Thank you! I also follow that sub and I have no complaints about their posts. They’re actually about FITNESS.

 

[sifer]

@crosswalk1991 I actually unsubbed from there because some of them (and it is a minority) can come across as a hostile to newbies. I think there needs to be a balance. I don't want it to only be questions about calories/dress sizes/waist measurements etc, but perhaps having a newbie thread where users can post their questions?

There's so much conflicting information out there. I still get confused sometimes. It would be nice to reach out to someone and say "yeah I know myfitnesspal gave you a 1200 cal allowance, but babe you're working out 6 days a week. You gotta eat more." but also not have it be every single post.

 

[aprile]

@tavares Same! And then you check their post history and it’s all the ED subs.

 

[jeskalynn]

@tavares I think that would be a good rule to have here

 

[brneyddeb]

@crosswalk1991 I saw that post and immediately looked at the measurements I took yesterday. I have a looong ways to go until I get to that 30in. and I felt bad because so many were complaining about it. But then I looked at where I started and I’ve lost 5in off of my waist alone (and 30+in over all of my body) since December. Fitness and getting into shape is such a fickle process and it can really mess with your mind. I’m taking it as a challenge to focus on mental improvement while sticking with the heathy changes I’ve started in my life.

 

[stillstanding27]

@brneyddeb This was me with the girl who said her thigh “swelled” up to 24” since training legs. I took a look at my measurements and I was like… well I’m training them to even get bigger if I want to crush a watermelon. The way other people perceive themselves shouldn’t be affecting us but it still kinda does.

 

[crosswalk1991]

@stillstanding27 Righttt! I want to be able to crush a watermelon too. Our quads are DEFINED.

 

[stillstanding27]

@crosswalk1991 QUADS OF STEEL

 

[agyemang]

@crosswalk1991 Totally agree. I love training for aesthetics but there is a limit, I feel like the intention and specifics matter a lot here, hopefully I can explain this properly. Forgive me bc this might sound pretentious and even controversial lol but it's also really worthwhile to think about why we're actually taking note of stuff like measurements or the size of individual body parts and assigning value to that? I'm only speaking as someone with years of experience of horrible body dysmorphia regarding my body shape and weight.

I personally think it's fine to take measurements and assess the size of your waist legs etc if you are overweight or obese and you're just trying to assess where you're losing fat the most, or if you're trying to put on muscle and just seeing if your arms or legs are getting bigger to make sure you're progressing properly. Obviously there is nothing wrong with wanting to tailor your body a little bit and have say bigger shoulders or bigger legs as long as it's done safely and in a way that doesn't already undermine or insult the body you have naturally (as in, your genetics and skeletal structure).

The issue is we don't live in vacuums and neither does our self esteem, we currently live in an era where being simultaneously super thick and thin and having BBL is the standard and it's so easy for a lot of us to start subconsciously assigning worth to a number on a tape or the number on the scale. The whole "ugh its unfortunate/annoying/less womanly to have xyz" like the post we saw yesterday about (and I'm not trying to shame her ofc) her legs swelling up to a specific inch - I'd also argue that's a similar problem with our torsos and literally anywhere else on a woman's body.

Women are socialised and essentially brainwashed into assigning value into measurements and body shapes where men aren't - "your waist needs to be below this measurement or it looks masculine and ugly" "if your bum and hips is this measurement it needs to be bigger or else you won't look like a woman" there is no acceptance of genetics and our unique body shapes because society at large tells us that we either fit in a specific, largely unattainable mold or we are just doomed to be ugly we are purposely taught to want to change and tweak everything because there's no money to be made in healthy, fit women of all shapes who just accept their genetics and structure. Look at how popular the "get rid of hip dips" videos are for example, the same with waist trainers. They're making convincing women that changing the skeletal structure of your body is possible through a cheap piece of material or some workouts.

They sell you a solution to a problem that doesn't even exist, and I guess my controversial take is that if all of us woke up tomorrow and looked in the mirror and just accepted our short or wide torsos, thicker legs and genetics then all of these posts regarding "how to get a snatched waist/wide hips/skinny legs" would never crop up again.

 

[dailyrx]

@agyemang Yes.

 

[christianmetallover]

@crosswalk1991 Especially when the person gives basically no information about their stats, diet, any exercise, goals, etc, and doesn't even reply to anyone who asks! Those are the most frustrating posts for me. How can anyone actually help you if we know nothing about your body and what you've tried?

At this point I think the mods need to limit weight loss posts to one or two days a week (Weight Loss Wednesdays for instance) and require that any weight loss posts need to include at least the basics I mentioned above, because otherwise the post is worthless!

 

[rorc]

@christianmetallover I hope not! Subs filled with weekly threads are extremely frustrating to scroll through. Maybe a better requirement would be for high quality posts, ie. ones that include enough information for anyone to answer it

 

[pleasesaveme]

@crosswalk1991

or get to a weight that’s beyond lower than the healthy weight you’re already at.

Do you mean lower than their minimum healthy weight? Or just lower than their current healthy weight? Unless someone is actively trying to get to a weight that is below their healthy range, I don't see why this is a big deal. Someone doesn't have to stop the moment they hit that maximum number. I wasn't super satisfied at 140 lbs, so I let myself just keep dwindling down. Now I'm in the lower part of my healthy range and prefer how I look to when I was 30 lbs heavier.

 

[aprile]

@pleasesaveme I think there are two trends we see, with some of the ones we’re thinking of for this trying to get to 18 bmi or slightly below. Or people that are trying to get to a lower number, but it’s killing their mental health and probably knees to do so. When you mention dwindling down, that’s sounds much more sustainable.