CrossFit culture…

godwrestler

New member
I’m new to CrossFit. I joined in August. I would like to know if the culture I am about to explain is universal.

People are standoffish and only talk to you when you engage them. Especially the super fit people. It’s weird. I feel very unwelcome. As for the trainers, I still have to ask the meaning of abbreviated exercises cuz nothing is explained.

Im sure I’m being sensitive. I am super pissed right now.

Had a cocky kid, young enough to be my son, tell me to switch to pushups from my knees. The way he said it was pity mixed w annoyed. I was super embarrassed.

I think this place is designed for advanced fitness people and not normal chubby people who are hella intimidated.
 
@godwrestler Crossfit is completely decentralized. Every gym is different. As others have said, sometimes even different classes within one gym may have different vibes. My gym is not like this and the owner/head coach would not tolerate it. So no, it isn't universal. I'm sorry that you had this experience.
 
@godwrestler people might be standoffish because they're trying to focus on their workout or maybe they view their gym time as "time I don't have to talk to people"

but if you don't like the atmosphere, find a new place. don't quit altogether, just find the place that matches your expectations
 
@jach I second this. I'm highly competitive and very focused on the workout. I can totally see how that comes off as stand-off -ish. BUT, keep in mind, I'm not trying to offend you (or new people to my gym) per se. I'm just very competitive, and I enjoy being competitive and focused. It's my meditation time. Like this comment states, each gym has different cultures, and each time slot of each gym have different personalities. Try them all!
 
@pjvermont Can confirm. I thought @dptgreg was aloof when I started CF. 2 classes with him I learned couldn’t be farther from the truth and now he’s one of my best friends.

Long story short, don’t be quick to judge, give them a chance to get to know you. Intimidation is normal when starting CF with experienced people around. Hang in there. You’ll be one of them soon.
 
@jach
because they're trying to focus on their workout

This. As someone who's become one of these people, I definitely developed a reputation of being unfriendly by accident when really I was just trying to make the most of the hour and pay attention to the coach, properly warm up, etc.
 
@jach a lot of the several years members feel a little stand offish at my gym but I remember I’m only a year king member and they have probably seen people come and go a lot during their time at the gym. My gym owners are super friendly and are inclusive of everyone. It varies gym to gym.
 
@godwrestler Sometimes certain class times have their own culture.

My gym the early morning crew is very intense and competitive.

Starting going after work and they are way more laid back and chatty which fits me better.
 
@benjames711 Agree with this; my 6:15am is friendly and people are just there to have a good workout. The people at the 5:15pm class are intimidating beasts—not saying they aren’t nice, just definitely in way better shape and much more competitive than I am.
 
@kuriosiesouschristos Absolutely. The 5am group does have older members but they are HARDCORE. I think all 5am groups are a special kind of fit 😂. The 6am class is all “normal” CrossFit people who just want a good workout. Middle aged dads and moms and school teachers etc. No one out to compete in any games LOL but def there to improve ourselves. Lots of laughs and cheering each other on.
 
One of the coaches has an hour commute so he has to get up at 3:30am to coach that class! It’s nuts! Lol!
 
@benjames711 This is so true! It’s sorta opposite at my box tho. We old fogies do the 5am and 6am classes. The beasts come out at 8:30am. The more chill and relaxed groups are at noon and 4:30pm, and then the late classes are dominated by young athletes primarily in their 20’s. We old fogies are already getting ready for bed by the time the last class rolls around. Lol. It’s really funny how the niches fall together!

This being said I have never met an unfriendly person in any class. Some standoffish, yes, but it wasn’t them purposefully being so. One girl I was super intimidated by, come to find out she’s just a super shy and introverted person who gets in the “zone” at the gym and unless you physically stop her and say hello she truly doesn’t even know you’re there. It’s nothing personal at all.

Find your niche. The bond I’ve made with my 6am peeps is amazing. We are ride or die! I love the midday groups also but the 6am is my family. Long story longer (sorry) Don’t get dismayed by the other gym members. You’re all there for the same reason.

As far as feeling talked down to by your coach, it shouldn’t be that way? If it is then that’s not cool? I know that I was extremely sensitive my first class (first few wks) of CrossFit (not saying that OP is also) and later I realized a lot of the things that I thought I was hearing as shaming or frustration wasn’t actually what was happening. It was me being super hard on myself and projecting the disappointment I had in myself for letting myself go, on one of my coaches. Come to find out he talks that way to everyone and is one of the most supportive, selfless people I have ever met! He has gone out of his way to help me and so many other members of the gym!

Stick with it. Give it a fair chance. I didn’t think I would and it has officially become an obsession. Lol. Hang in there and good luck!
 
@benjames711 True. Our 6am group is silent (sleepy) and intense but the nooners are a bunch of clowns, having a great time. I love both groups with all my heart.
 
@benjames711 This! When I read the OP, this is what I was thinking. We had a pretty competitive gym as a whole except the 6am group, which was really the drinking team who also did CrossFit. We were super groggy, sarcastic, and laid back. When a afternoon person would come in, we'd have to tell him to chill because it's to early lol

When I moved to this city, this is the first place I joined. I fit right in. 5 years later I'm a groomsmen at one a classmates wedding and I've been invited to a few more.

Every gym is different but so is every class. Try different times
 
@godwrestler It’s all about the gym’s culture, not necessarily Crossfit’s overall culture. That’s why it says not uncommon for a city to have multiple gyms. Each one is probably going to have a different culture. I recently left my super hardcore gym for a more relaxed gym because after a recent injury and my son being born I realized I don’t necessarily want to kill myself at every workout, and that getting up at 0500 is more difficult when you average 2-3 hours of sleep. This gym has more afterwork options.

Do some drop ins at different gyms, and see which one meets your ideal culture. From what I’ve noticed the afternoon/evening classes are much more relaxed and usually full of folks filtering in after work.

However, at the same time your gym should have done a “beginner’s class” to team you how things work… each gym I’ve been to did that. Also, just listen to the trainers and do your best. You’re paying for it, as long as you feel like you’re getting something out of it, that’s all that matters. I’m sorry you had that experience, however I learned very quickly when I first started I wasn’t in near the shape I needed to be and I had to lower my expectations. I scaled down super far, did really light weight, and basically had to learn from the bottom but I’m so glad I did. My form is great, I’m lifting more than I thought I could, and I see the progress, so you might also need to be a little more open minded. There’s nothing wrong with lowering weight, doing knee pushups, etc if it’ll help you in the long run.
 
@godwrestler This gets asked all the time, and every time I try to remind people that sometimes you do have to be the one to approach others. Just because someone's fit doesn't mean they're socially outgoing. Even when I was at my fittest and most confident, I was still awkward as fuck and found it difficult to introduce myself to new members.
 
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