Does anyone else feel like they look incredibly stupid at the gym?

@crucisdecristo This post hits home! I'm a novice in the gym, and I felt exactly the same way as you do. A lot of people consider me tiny (154cm, 48kg) and because of that, I've always felt intimidated to go on the squat racks and do deadlifts. I used to have a well-planned exercise which I didn’t complete just because I was too intimidated.

The beautiful thing about the gym is that even though it feels intimidating, really, no one actually cares about anyone other than themselves. Once I put that mindset in my head, I started doing the things that I've always wanted.

I guess another good tip is to have someone to go to the gym together with, but I'm aware that that's not always a viable option for some people. But shifting your mindset, at least for me, was key.

Hope you’ll feel better soon! You got this.
 
@crucisdecristo The only people who will notice and care are people who actively seek out that sort of thing and are just all around shite people. I people watch in the gym but I don't actually "care" what they're doing if that makes sense. I might internally LOL at something goofy but I quickly move on and forget about them.

One time I was pushing the HIIT sled around my gym and someone else was coming towards me with the other sled. I tried to scoot out of the way so we wouldn't crash into one another and ended up slamming into one of the metal support poles in the gym. It was so loud I heard it over my headphones which were full blast. Everyone turned and looked but less than a second or two later they went back to whatever they were doing.

Another time I was on this ab bench and I was abysmally sweaty that day for some reason. My feet came out of the supports and I slid painfully slow down the bench. My head hit the floor and I flipped feet over head because I couldn't catch myself. 😂

It took me an entire year at the gym to stop caring about what other people thought. It's hard to get out of the mindset of "everyone is watching me" but it happens eventually.
 
@crucisdecristo This morning I whipped my self several times with a skipping rope(accidentally), slipped in mud and ran from towards the wrong group (it was dark I got confused). I still pushed through cos that’s what you do. Everyone is looking at them selves. Occasionally stuff happens that’s notable but day to day stuff no one notices.
 
@crucisdecristo Try one new thing at a time, combined with something you’re comfortable doing.

You can also try the exercise at home first, without it being a work out.

Practice makes perfect when it comes to any skill, no matter if it’s physical, social or cognitive :)
 
@crucisdecristo I felt like this too, I've sort of gotten over it by just taking a look around at the gym. Everyone is doing ridiculous looking exercises because those are what work for them- just do what works for you! Don't look around at anyone while doing them, just get the job done
 
@crucisdecristo Everyone looks silly but we're all in our own bubble trying to pretend we're looking fine and that everyone else is not watching us :)

I like to remind myself that people don't know everyone's back stories or health history, so we don't know what level of fitness others are on. Someone could be taking it easy today because they slept wrong and knows they'll seize their neck if they goes too hard, or someone had a shit tonne of coffee that day and needs to go fast so they can fall asleep later lol.
 
@crucisdecristo A while ago there was a dude in my gym absolutely going to TOWN on the leg press. He was grunting and pulling the most tortured faces. Making a lot of noise. Like he was battling a goddamn demon (and rightly so, considering the amount of plates he was pressing).

He sounded funny. His face looked damn stupid. Everyone in the gym was aware of his presence and I had to stop myself from smiling. But mentally, I was also high-fiving this guy cos he was SHOWING THE FUCK UP and doing the work. Oh, and his legs were damn built and a testament to his dedication to the leg press, let me tell ya.

And if he wasn't buff? If his legs were twigs? I still would have been high-fiving him, mentally, for not being afraid to be an absolute beast.

Everyone else in the gym was obviously aware of his presence, but no one was giving him the side-eye or whispering about him or acknowledging him. Cos we all come to the gym to look a bit stupid in the pursuit of bettering ourselves.

If no one cared how incredibly stupid that guy looked, no one's going to give a heck about how you look. Trust me :)
 
@crucisdecristo I stopped caring. I do whatever I want. I’m there to workout for my body. A lot of great exercises, stretches, look weird but I’ll never limit myself because I’m self conscious of what other people think. My aim is always to get the best workout possible.
 
@crucisdecristo Yes, but I don't care. I'm the one who has to live in this body and if I need to look stupid for an hour a day 3-5 times a week to keep it healthy, well, gotta look stupid then.
 
@crucisdecristo Yeah, sometimes I feel self-conscious about my routine, but not usually for those reasons. Usually it's because it's not hardcore enough/trendy enough/not what others would prefer to do. I run slow because I'm just starting out, and lift lighter than I probably normally could because I'm still working through some injuries. I prefer steady state to HIIT, because I'm not in a hurry and enjoy taking my time at the gym.

I try to remember that, just by getting up off the couch and showing up consistently, progressing and following the programs I've chosen, I've already jumped over a big personal hurdle. And also that I don't need to prove shit to anybody, especially strangers who don't know a thing about me -- I know I've challenged myself and I'm getting the results I'm looking for, and that's all that matters.

Sometimes I see a lot of judgment thrown around on some fitness forums about people in the gym "bullshitting around and sitting on their phones", doing weird exercises, or doing xyz and how it's not going to get them the results they want. Usually it's people who habitually gatekeep and for some reason aren't satisfied with just working on themselves. I find this type of thinking pretty condescending towards other people -- I mean yeah maybe they are just clueless and bullshitting, or maybe their goals aren't what you think they are, maybe they have limitations you can't see that keep them from doing certain things or going at a certain pace, or maybe they simply aren't physically ready for what you consider to be a "proper" workout. Maybe they're just bored and want to do a weird ass workout. In any case, people need to mind their business if it's not hurting anyone.

I am thankful that it seems like gym culture is becoming less and less tolerant of that kind of thing.
 
@mattang3
Sometimes I see a lot of judgment thrown around on some fitness forums about people in the gym "bullshitting around and sitting on their phones"

In all fairness there's a huge difference between using your during the short break between sets and sitting around taking up equipment/benches etc literally doing nothing but using your phone.

It's disrespectful to other gym users and incredibly frustrating when you're on a time limit and can't use equipment because someone has decided to sit there for 10 minutes scrolling through Facebook.
 
@dawn16 I believe it is frustrating and that it does exist, but it's not what I'm talking about in this particular case. For what it's worth, I've never encountered someone who won't move or swap sets with you while they're resting when asked, if they are taking long rest periods. I do see people sitting around on their phones, but they're not usually in the way, and rest periods are a part of several programs. Sometimes I'm sitting around on my phone because the program said to take a rest for x amount of minutes, and I'd like to do something other than watch my timer count down. I go sit somewhere where I'm not in the way, or swap with someone else. Not to say what you're describing doesn't happen, it's just not really on my radar. Maybe this behavior is more common in some places I don't go to.

What I am talking about is people use this as an opportunity to throw shade at people they don't perceive as working out hard enough, taking breaks they deem to be too often or too long (without taking up equipment), or not doing exercises they deem worthwhile. I've heard mocking of people who focus on/want to do steady state cardio ("cardio bunnies"), not going hard enough (people who want to walk on the treadmills instead of run), complaining about women showing up with makeup or workout clothes that are too nice (??), or people who want to do isolated exercises/use the specialized weight machines. It's kind of a bogus thing to do, especially when these are strangers, you've got no idea what their goals or limitations are, or what their circumstances are.

It's, of course, not surprising that these people exist, there are judgmental gatekeeping assholes in every single community out there.

In my opinion, neither are acceptable. Definitely be considerate of the space you're in, but also mind your own damn business. For the time that they have the machine, they can do whatever they want with it, as long as they're using it and not hogging it. Unless you're their coach, you don't have a right to dictate and judge their workout.
 
@crucisdecristo I have incredibly high gym anxiety and also figured no one cares brought my little work out plan to the gym and then proceed to cry with anxiety and felt even more dumb.

This doesnt help anyone other than to say I feel ya!
 
@crucisdecristo I'm pretty certain I look like a goof at the gym, even when I'm doing things I'm confident in (spin class, swimming). But then it occurred to me, if I'm self-conscious at my basic competence level, everybody ELSE is probably self-conscious too! So now I don't worry about it too much, I turn up the music in my head phones and don't give a fck :)
 
@crucisdecristo Honestly, and take it however you want. I feel like the people who are worried about being judged at the gym are the same people who may do it to others. I don't understand how that crosses someone's mind like, "I'm not going to look stupid in front of everyone?" Who walks around looking at others like, "wtf does she think she's doing over there?" How does that happen?
 
@crucisdecristo I Often feel stupid at the gym and I'm a qualified fitness coach. People love a good stare in a big public gym!
Have a look in your area for a boutique gym ( small independent gym).
Over the years I have found that they have a much friendlier client base.
Generally speaking everybody there is in the same boat and have the same goals so everybody helps and encourages each other.
 
@crucisdecristo Honestly working with a personal trainer changed how confident and comfortable I feel at the gym. She always just walks up the equipment, asks if anyone is using it, and is friendly and self assured. I started copying her when I went on my own. Definitely scary but less so the more I practiced!

Also, knowing that I was using the equipment and doing the movements correctly was a big help. I feel confident because I know I’m doing right!
 
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