@uticus tl;dr—
Digging deep in what your motivation is rooted in, enjoying the process, and emotional literacy/regulation is how ya do it. Depending on willpower alone fueled by feelings of “not being good enough” is unhealthy and unsustainable.
Long version—
Finding a way to make it personally beneficial to you while mid-process is how you do this, I feel. Making the process itself your goal, essentially.
For me, exercise helps prevent postural pain from sedentary desk work. I also view it as part of my toolkit to help me regulate my ADHD. So, I see daily results from my exercise.
Aesthetically, it takes a lot longer to see results and gather any sort of pleasure from your hard work. Some days, you will feel down on yourself, and you stop giving a shit about these long term aesthetic goals because you have more important things to worry about. These will be the days where your motivation to go just won’t be there, especially if that motivation is solely fueled by shame or a feeling of not being good enough. And if you don’t go, that “not good enough” shame can make you become avoidant as a way to cope. The tough feelings associated with exercise stops feeling worth it mentally, y’know? And if you brute force motivation, it can be over corrective and unhealthy. I brute forced motivation fueled by ADHD shame when I went to college, and it gave me a mood disorder lol. Your brain needs (not just wants) healthy and rewarding stimulation. Long term goals generally don’t provide that necessary stimulation.
Working out really staves off dopamine seeking behavior which can affect my emotional regulation as well as my ability to socialize and function. And even though I can logically understand what’s happening, the “shame” of ADHD can be intense enough to bring on my depression. That can lead to a ruminative spiral that’s even harder to control. That’s my motivation. I simply feel better mentally if I work out.
When I lift, I feel like I get healthy hits of dopamine. I feel calmer throughout the day, proud of myself for showing up, and generally more in control. My sleep and appetite are also improved. Considering I also take adhd meds, the sleep/appetite management is super important.
How to make exercise sustainably stimulating will be different for everyone. I recommend reading Brene Brown’s books. She really helped me develop mindfulness and emotional literacy.
I feel that lack of motivation is an emotion regulation problem and not a laziness problem. When I understand my emotions and where they come from, I can develop strategies to process my emotions and control my behavior that don’t depend on willpower alone.