Frustrated about body size and TDEE

@sweetkf adjusting to eating more because you have a much higher TDEE is a completely different mentality to having to adjust to eating less. that’s literally the opposite concept of what this post is about. it’s not “perspective”
 
@legolas2106 This. Especially because our bodies (all bodies, not just petite people) are primed to want us to eat more and more, not to eat less. We have to fight against what our bodies want us to do always.
 
@johnjs37 Where did you get this? Primed to eat more? 🤣

Taller people expend more energy hence the higher TDEE. More bone mass, more muscle mass usually, even fat mass. We don’t expend as much energy and should be as hungry as a result. If you are as hungry, maybe you really aren’t eating enough if that’s true hunger and you’re under estimating your actual TDEE.

I track, I eat at restaurants, I order what I want and stop when I’m full. Read that again - stop when I’m full. Why would you want to overeat? Seriously why? I’m so completely confused.
 
@sweetkf What I mean is biologically humans have more of a tendency to put out on weight because our ancestors went through periods of feast and famine. We evolved to survive famines and bulk up during feasts. Most of us live in a "feast" and we need to fight biological urges to eat more. That is what I am referring to. It's just the way our bodies are built.

Also I don't have a "problem." I am not overweight. I am just venting about what I experience in my journey to stay the size I am. If you don't experience the same thing, that is great for you. I am honestly happy for you that you don't go through this.
 
@sweetkf But that's what I am referring to, the fact that we need smaller portions. I want to be able to have the experience of enjoying food as much as bigger people.
 
@johnjs37 You can enjoy foods— do you mean you want to enjoy clearing the last bite from your plate? In that case, share a meal with a friend or box up half the food as soon as it arrives. Then you can finish your plate without eating too much.
 
@jchrist4sho This is a good idea and i have done this before.
But my point is that particularly with very calorie dense foods like pizza or cake, I can easily overeat and not really feel it. Like I can put away a cheeseburger and fries from shake shack no problem and that's around 900 calories. Thats way too much food for me for one meal since my TDEE is around 1400. If a 200 pound 5'10 man ate what I was eating it would be the correct amount of calories for him for one meal and he would probably feel just as satisfied. People assume satiety corresponds directly with caloric needs but that gets very skewed when consuming foods that trigger dopamine in our brains.
 
@johnjs37 Well there is a solution. You want to eat more? Work out more, walk more, gain more lean mass so that your TDEE is higher… Eat more on cheat days. Or work with a therapist to see why food is seemingly your main source of pleasure and try to replace it with something else.

Or give up and gain weight that’s also an option.
 
@blingey123 A bit of tough love is always what gets them. I don’t understand why this reply is being disliked. It’s true! Just be more active and invest in your tdee. It’s really not that hard folks
 
@blingey123 Nobody asked for “a solution” and nobody said food is their main source of pleasure. Food and the sensation of being full are sources of pleasure for most humans however and shorties have special challenges in this area. It’s perfectly reasonable to look to this group for support about how that can be frustrating sometimes.
 
@rossylisy I’m petite too, I’m 5’3. I don’t need as much food to feel satiety as someone who is 6’2. Dreaming of being able to eat beyond what’s required for your body and feeling frustrated because you can’t eat more is definitely not a healthy outlook on food. Food is a source of energy, if you feel sad that you can’t eat more than what your body needs it just means that you see food as the source of pleasure more than the source or energy. Unless you change the way you see food you’re always gonna be frustrated.
 
@blingey123 Well good for you, some of us aren’t so lucky. We are frequently a little hungry and that’s just life if we want to stay within a healthy weight range. Feelings are just feelings and feeling frustrated is a perfectly reasonable emotion to have at times, so is sadness, and no, people aren’t “always gonna feel frustrated” for acknowledging it. Acknowledging reality is an important part of dealing with it, and recognizing that some of us have to monitor our food intake like fitness athletes just to stay at a healthy weight is reality for some of us. This sub is to discuss our challenges and this is one. Telling other people to look at food as fuel and just get over it is simplistic. It’s like saying look at sex as procreation and exercise as merely a way to burn calories and your job as just a way to pay bills. It drains all the joy out of life. Sure, nobody should let frustration consume them, but it can be a part of shorties staying fit, and so can discouragement, and that’s okay. Support and knowing others feel the same sometimes and persevere anyway is part of what motivates many of us.
 
@johnjs37 I understand your frustration. However, with TDEE you need to remember it’s like BMI. It’s an average for people roughly your size, age, etc.

I am a personal trainer and nutrition coach. If you’d be interested I’d love to offer you a 5 day nutrition assessment to help you figure out your bodies TDEE and macro break down. Feel free to shoot me a chat if you’re interested.
 
@johnjs37 I'm a 6 foot, 185-190 lb guy. So not petite. Low activity level these days. I usually just eat one meal a day. Not OMAD though. Probably five days a week, I just have a somewhat early dinner. I rarely snack. When I do have an earlier meal as well it is usually something pretty low calorie, usually salad with a low cal dressing. Even with all that, I come across portion sizes that are way too large. It's fine. Chef Boyardee might get mad because I didn't clean my plate, but fuck him. You can enjoy food without eating it all and you don't need to eat three meals a day. You can do lower calorie stuff to kick start your day like protein shakes if you need that. I used to when I actually worked out.
 
@dawn16 bro if you’re 190 lb man and down to one meal

you have to understand how much less we are actually able to eat (even when doing omad)
 
@hurrix I do understand. If I can't get through a full restaurant portion at my size, someone way smaller than me can't come close. That's the point. You can enjoy food without having to eat all of it.
 
@dawn16 This is not about what we CAN do, this is about what we WANT to do. I’m sure you can enjoy orgasms if you only have two a week. The average for a dude in his 30s is “just under 3”. Wouldn’t you PREFER 3 though? So now do you understand how ridiculous your comment is?
 
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