@midddeb If tripod headstand makes you feel like there is too much weight on the neck, a
traditionally bound headstand can offer more support. You have the whole length of your forearms to press into, and can use that to keep the weight out of your neck.
In tripod, it is a big load on the cervical spine, so alignment becomes crucial. Make sure that you are on the very crown of your head--the eye gaze should look straight behind you. Think about stacking yourself: Toes over hips over shoulders. Never go into the pose unless you can do so with control--don't get into the habit of kicking up into headstand at a wall because it causes a "banana back" that is hard to correct and puts a ton of weight on the neck at an awkward angle.
Usually if I feel like the weight is not even between the tripod points, I'll stay in the tuck position and try to shift weight around there. Once I find that sweet spot, then I extend the legs. It's not necessarily about pushing more with the hands, but rather shifting the weight a little bit back into them.
Also, the angle of your arms matters a lot. I find that if the bend at my elbows is not a good solid right angle, it throws the rest of the posture off a lot. Hope this useful!