how do you manage stress in ways that aren’t exercise??

[courtneekmroberts]

@porcelainrose You've mentioned wanting non-exercise ways of de-stressing, but might I suggest trying to change the way you move your body and workout as well.

I used to put so much stress on myself to workout hard and always leave the gym sore. But that was making me dread workouts, so I've tried to change my focus to just moving my body. Sometimes that is a hard run, but often it's a walk or chill yoga.

I'd suggest going on a walk with an audiobook or doing 20 minutes of calming yoga instead of a 45 minute HIIT workout at the beginning of the day. You mentioned getting a dog at some point, and that's a great way to allow yourself to move and get fresh air.

Obviously, things like therapy, focusing on getting quality sleep, less caffeine, etc. are also incredibly important ways to manage your stress levels, but I think finding ways to be active that are also gentle and calming can be really helpful.

 

[jamesdavidsmith]

@porcelainrose Music! Going on a walk & listening to music. Or a car ride. Just taking in the sights around you to your favorite songs.

 

[godactsonme]

@porcelainrose Guided meditation. Tara Brach is someone who I find helpful.

 

[jaydenx]

@porcelainrose There was a time when I could not work out because of a shitty diagnosis that I had to sort out. Being an athlete is so much of who I am that I couldn’t imagine even a short while without my activities. During that time, I focused a lot on walking with my dogs at a moderate pace, not for fitness, but to be able to get out of the house and do something that wasn’t work. I spent a lot of time floating in the lake that summer reading “crappy” books that would do nothing to make me a literary scholar. I also had to be on an elimination diet, so I started focusing on cooking everything from scratch and doubling down on growing “safe” foods. My small garden became so important to my mental health. I felt like I was using my physical labor to grow the foods that would help heal my body. I also discovered the joys of homemade bread and pasta. Knead by hand and put all your worries into that loaf. The repetitive nature of kneading and weeding are so therapeutic to me.

Ok, now don’t make fun of me, but doing my nails. I keep my nails super short (see other favorite non-sport activities), but I really got into nail art. My husband even notices when I’m really stressed because I am painting my nails every few days.

My body was so messed up at the beginning of that ordeal and my anxiety was through the roof, but by the time I was on the other side of it, I was more in-shape than ever, even without my regular exercise routine. Good nutrition, healthy habits, self care, and actually taking the time to recognize that I needed a break was so helpful.

Thanks for posting this. Writing out those strategies is making me realize that I have gotten away from some of those healthy habits lately and I need to get back into them.

 

[dawn16]

@porcelainrose

• therapy
• journaling
• doodling/art journaling (you could also do Zentangles or adult coloring books)
• cannabis (it's legal here)
• baths... I got this thing that covers the overflow drain so it makes my baths deeper. I use lavender scented epsom salts, drink a glass of wine, and made a chill playlist just for this time.
• chamomile tea

I'm also trying to prioritize rest and sleep. I'm trying to get better at sleep hygiene - having a wind down schedule, putting my phone down an hour before bed, putting on lavender scented lotion, massaging feet and hands, journaling.

 

[buckyboy]

@porcelainrose I like to write and journal for non physical stress relief! It still feels active and “releasing” stress/feelings which is a big thing I get out of working out and playing sports. Half the time I’m not writing anything important or good — it’s just random crappy doodles, lists of things I did that day or things I have coming up, etc.

 

[donny4793]

@porcelainrose What is the most stressful thing in your life right now? Can you take 4-12 weeks off of it?

I work in the tech industry, where we talk a lot about developing or preventing burnout. If you're having physical symptoms of your stress, you're very burned out. So rather than try to find more or different ways to manage stress, what if you just... stopped doing the thing that stressed you out?

Are you in a shitty relationship? Is your job terrible? Are you in grad school? Are you doing long-term care for a dependent relative? Everything except the last thing can be left, delayed, or postponed. I know it's easy for me to say, I'm not in your life--but your health is worth so much more than whatever is stressing you out. You're already being proactive about your problem--but why is your approach 'how can I cope with this better?' when it could be 'How do I get out of this unhealthy situation, even temporarily?'

 

[porcelainrose]

@donny4793 I’m 3 years into a 5-6 year long phd, and i unfortunately can’t take a total break or leave of absence without also immediately (literally like, day one, minute one) losing my funding and healthcare. higher ed is absolutely a super toxic, demanding work environment, and i’m already looking at jobs outside of academia for once i’m done—it’s absolutely one of if not the single biggest stressor on my mind lately. but it feels like the stress of a completely new job search or losing the material comfort of income/healthcare are far more intense than just taking a step back from being a complete work addict all the time. while my job is indeed demanding, i also very often force myself to go way above and beyond what is really expected of me in the pursuit of being “the best” or “perfect.” i think it would just do me well to take serious stock of what i actually have to be doing for work vs what i’m doing because im being too demanding with myself or allowing the toxic competitive environment to dictate my actions.

you’re right, my health must be the priority. especially considering i (sometimes) prioritize physical fitness over so many other things, it’s time to take seriously the roll stress has in that physical fitness

 

[bryanyeap]

@porcelainrose Man, I feel so hard for grad students. You guys have a really shit deal, it’s such a fucked up power relation with your advisor. Are there efforts to unionize at your school? Universities can’t run without you, and they don’t do anything to fix the human toll of bad advisors squeezing their students dry. Not to even mention the lack of anything like HR if someone in your lab is a terrible human.

 

[donny4793]

@porcelainrose I'm so sorry to hear that. If You're already looking at getting out of academia, perhaps some of that competitive stuff you were talking about is optional? Industry doesn't care how many papers you published in necessarily, they just care about you having the PhD after your name.

My bestie is also getting out of academia after something like a 5-year job hunt for a TT position in her field, and it's absolutely crushed her. She's one of the most qualified people in the world for what she does, but because she's in the humanities, there are way more applicants for every job than there are jobs, and professors won't retire!

 

[standinthegap4u]

@porcelainrose • Meditation (I love zen Buddhist style - zazen - but lots of techniques work well for different people)

• Get into nature, bonus bliss if I can wriggle my bare toes in grass or sand

• Journaling

• Solo dance party (I guess this is technically cardio, but flailing around and singing to cheesy pop songs is pretty great)

• Do something nice for somebody else

 

[littlepebble]

@porcelainrose Cleaning / organizing / house projects. Nothing makes me feel stress free like a clean and put together house. I also love building stuff for my house. It’s still an active and physical activity but makes me feel energized and in a great mood. As a high energy type A person sitting on the couch just isn’t relaxing.

I’d find out for yourself if you feel guilty for sitting around and resting, or if it’s just that sitting around doesn’t energize and relax you in the way other activities would like a house project. My partner loves spending a lazy Sunday sitting on the couch and hanging out but for me a lazy Sunday is organizing a closet, going on a hike, checking out a new cafe.

Cooking in another one. Not baking, I’m so bad at it, it causes stress

 

[lanfree]

@porcelainrose Focusing on a task, something you enjoy that you acn get engrossed in. I find jigsaws, other puzzles like sudoku, crochet, things like that help. Things you have to focus on and slow you down. Also GBBOs back catalogue got me through some tough times.

Dan Harris has some great intro to meditation vids and tips on his podcast too

 

[dantex]

@porcelainrose I meditate, but there's a pretty big caveat to this. You have to do it when you're relaxed too, not just when you're stressed.

 

[dawn16]

@porcelainrose I also tend to just go faster and harder when I'm stressed, and wind up being active all the time and feeling fried and worn down but also unable to rest. It becomes a cycle for me that will just get worse over months and years unless I do something.

For me, that thing is just resting. Reducing the physical and mental load on myself. I hit a point where I was getting stretched really thin last year with grad school and didn't feel like myself anymore. I didn't like that, so I made the decision to reduce my physical strain by taking the bus instead of biking every day (challenging ride for me). I stayed in bed on Friday mornings and tried to take it easy on Fridays completely. I made the decision to reduce my commitment to grad school because the program wasn't really worth it for me.

Obviously everyone has different things that are causing them stress and some are more changeable than others - if I can't change something that's causing me stress, I try to reduce my mental commitment to it. This helped a lot with an old job.

Another thing that is clutch is quality time with others. Cuddling and watching a movie with my partner. Hanging out with a friend in their backyard. Even just being in a place where others are present helps, like a cafe or park, although that's not really a thing right now in many places cuz COVID.

Finally, love spending time outside in a non active way, when weather permits! Just sitting in a park or on the porch reading, talking, having a cup of tea...it's the best.

 

[thebadcatholic]

@porcelainrose So glad that you are talking with your doctor to try and resolve this. Here are my favorite non-exercise stress relievers:

-intimacy with my husband, not even necessarily sex but just being close to one another. Feeling his skin on my skin instantly makes the stress melt away.

-time with my dog, just sitting on the couch petting her, playing tug of war, etc.

-time outdoors, even in cold weather! Going for a walk or just sitting outside recharges me like nothing else.

-a phone call with a close friend or family member

-reading a fiction book

-listening to a podcast, usually I walk when I do this but you can just chill on the couch

-gardening

-cooking and baking

-meditation, just sitting and breathing for 10-20 minutes, nothing fancy just try to focus on my breath and let thoughts float by like clouds if they arise

-cannabis, just a few hits off the vape before bed relaxes me

ETA: restorative yoga! It's definitely not exercise, it's all done on the floor with lots of blankets and pillows/cushions and the goal is to relax your body and mind as much as possible and tap into your parasympathetic nervous system. An hour of restorative yoga has a similar effect on the body and mind as two hours of restful sleep. It's absolutely incredible!

 

[bevinluvwithjesus]

@porcelainrose Go to bed early, read a book. Hot shower (I live in a cold country). Listen to audiobooks, podcast whilst going for a walk.

 

[porcelainrose]

@bevinluvwithjesus hot showers really do cure so much—i’m in a cold place too and it’s amazing what that can do for my mind & body ))

 

[bevinluvwithjesus]

@porcelainrose Yes it relaxes the muscles, I would normally use the sauna in the gym this time of year. Wim Hoff would probably tell me to take cold showers to lower inflammation but what can I say, I'm a wimp.

 

[aristotle1]

@porcelainrose I like to make really elaborate meals. Having to hyper focus on a recipe and then having a quantifiable outcome really scratches a mental itch for me.